I often think one of the hardest things to understand in life is the way someone else feels. As I get older, it becomes more and more true. Even when you go through a similar situation as someone, it's hard to understand exactly how they feel.
But what's even harder than understanding how someone feels is knowing when someone is or isn't okay.
I have friends who are as transparent as they come, and when something's bothering them, it shows. I have friends who have no problem just opening up and telling me exactly what's wrong when it's wrong. But then I have friends who are a little more like me.
They never let it show, and they never open up about it. They hold their problems and their worries on the inside. They put on their best face to show everyone else they are okay.
But the reality is, sometimes they're not.
Sometimes, they don't want to lay their problems on someone else. Sometimes, they don't want someone to worry about them. Sometimes, they just don't want anyone to know.
But this is what I do understand.
Being there for someone makes a difference. Sending a simple text. Making a simple phone call. Having a simple conversation. It makes the world of difference for someone who is going through something they might not even understand.
It doesn't have to be asking what's wrong or if everything is okay. It can be asking how their day is going or what's new with them. Making someone feel less alone makes a difference.
It's easy to get caught up in your own life and your own problems and situations. Often times we think, "Sam posted the cutest picture yesterday; she looked so happy!" WRONG. That's the misconception. It's easy to smile for a picture. It's easy to laugh while you're out with your friends.
Because who wants to be a "buzz kill" and ruin everyone's time with the problems you're dealing with personally and internally? Although there are people out there who will send you a text and let you know everything that's bothering them, and you'll be able to do everything you can to help.
There are people out there who won't send a text, who don't want to bother you with what's going on with them.
It makes a difference to ask them to lunch, to send them a text and checking in, to call them on your long ride home from work to just let them know you're there and you're thinking about them. Because it can change their feeling of bothering you. Because it can help them have to courage and strength to confide in you.
It may be hard to understand what someone is going through. It may be hard to know if someone is okay. But it's easy to make a difference.
