Having a mental illness undoubtedly makes life harder than it already is, and learning to love your life becomes one of the hardest battles you'll fight.
But, you know what's even harder than that? Learning to love your illness.
I let my depression define me for a long time; this contributes to the downfall of my social life, grades and relationships. I wanted to isolate myself and live in misery. Why would I want that? Because I didn't know who I was without those feelings. Depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and self-harm was all I knew for a long time.It was a battle against myself to come out of this downwards spiral. To explain it better, picture a water slide. You're going down so fast, and even if you wanted to go back up, there's no way. The only option is down unless the water stops, and I never thought it would.
I had to wake up everyday and fight my own brain which was extremely exhausting: Mentally, physically and emotionally. However, looking back, I learned a lot.
Mental illness won't define you unless you allow it to.
You can let your illness define you. You can miss out on so many opportunities and blame it on your illness. You can live a miserable life if that's what you want. Or, you can wake up everyday and choose to fight the fight. You can choose to be strong and push through. You can choose recovery. You can choose to not let it define who you are.
Don't fight for the people who leave your life.
Don't chase after people who walk out on you. This will contribute to your illness and potentially make it worse. Learn to let go.
Recovery isn't linear.
Recovery is going to have it's highs and it's lows. You can have a great week and feel like you're on top, and then the next day feel like you're on the bottom again. It's important to understand that this is okay. Accept it, take that day to feel your emotions, and then promise yourself that the next day you're going to get back up and try again.
Not everyone will understand.
You're going to find people who don't believe in mental illness. You're going to find people who think you're lying. You're going to find people who make you feel like shit for having depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, or whatever it is. However, trying to prove you're not lying is a waste of time. Arguing is a waste of time. Don't work yourself up over those people.
It's important to talk about it.
The first step we need to take to end the stigma around mental health is communication and education. We need to be talking, spreading awareness, building connections, etc. Share your story, share your struggles, share your recovery process. Be there for others and let others be there for you. There is no shame in mental health. There is no shame in struggling. There is no shame in recovery.
My depression taught me how to be grateful for what I have. It taught me to appreciate even the smallest things in life. It taught me how to feel sympathy and empathy.
My depression taught my kindness. It taught me to always be nice to others. It taught me to share my resources with others.
Most importantly, my depression taught me how to fight. How to be there for myself. How to get through the bad days and how to survive those "rock bottom" weeks. My depression gave me strength and for that, I am thankful.
