Anxiety. A word tossed around so much that it seems like everyone has it these days. However, likely only half actually have an anxiety disorder. There's a difference between feeling anxious over something major and having anxiety about things that seem like normal, everyday occurrences.
What bothers me greatly is how a lot of people who have some form of an anxiety disorder: depression, generalized anxiety, OCD, paranoia, are made to feel like they have to hide it from society because it's supposedly taboo to actually bring such issues into public light.
Wrong.
Anxiety in every form needs to be spoken about and no longer should anyone suffering be made to feel ashamed. Honestly, if people were more open about it they not only would realize just how many people actually have it, but they also would feel immense relief from voicing such feelings with one another.
I have had pretty bad anxiety ever since I was 8 years old. I used to feel shame in telling people, but now I have realized that it's simply a part of my life and that if anyone does judge me for it, they simply aren't worth it.
Plain and simple.
Like the quote says: "those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
A lot of things can trigger anxiety, such as crowds, starting a new job/school, meeting someone new, etc. When anxiety attacks come on, it's like a faucet that won't shut off. It's like being trapped in a glass box and no one can hear you cry out for help. It's almost like being suffocated.
Anxiety can make you believe there are problems that may not actually be happening. This ties into paranoia. If you feel someone looked at you a certain way or said something to you that seemed off, you may jump to conclusions and convince yourself that they hate you and have even made everyone else around you hate you.
In reality, they may just have been tired or not aware that they came off in such a way. But with anxiety, mountains are made out of molehills. You walk into a room and feel like everyone's watching your every move and talking about you. It's pure hell, honestly.
Anxiety can sometimes make you feel disconnected from the world. Sometimes you feel like you're invisible or that people are just pretending to be your friend/ like you. You don't believe that people can truly want to be around you even if they express such. This is a reason why it's hard for many people with anxiety to show emotion; it's a defense mechanism. We don't want to let our guards down just so we can be hurt. This applies to friendships, relationships, family bonds, workplace interactions, and more.
Anxiety logic: better to not feel than to feel it all and get destroyed in the end.
It can be very hard to make friends with anxiety as like I stated above, you feel a lack of trust in others out of fear they will just be fake and judge you. It can be hard to date for that same reason.
Another very common part of having anxiety is needing to disassociate for a bit. When feeling overwhelmed or too socially stimulated, many people with anxiety will want some time alone. They may cancel plans, not text back, and just stay home where they can collect themselves and recuperate. So if a friend with anxiety abruptly cancels on you or takes a while to respond, don't jump to being angry at them, instead understand it's just part of anxiety.
If you don't have an anxiety disorder consider yourself lucky. It's pure torture. Spending every day constantly on edge and fighting hard to conceal it is very difficult to do. But there are ways to work through it. Talking about what you're thinking/feeling with people you trust and/or to a therapist is probably the most effective way to tame this monster that's controlling you. Medication is also an effective option.
PSA: It's not a sign of weakness to get help, but rather a sign of strength.
Basically, there are options out there and you don't have to suffer in silence. Life is too beautiful and short to waste feeling crappy or stressed about things that aren't worth it, or to feel sad and down, or be constantly on edge. It's not easy, but learning how to cope and work past any anxiety related issues is one more step towards freeing yourself from this box that traps you.
