One year ago today I had finished the sorority recruitment process and was anxiously waiting to open my bid card and find out which sorority I would run home to. My heart sank a little when I opened the envelope. I received a bid from my second choice sorority. I wasn't sad or upset just a little disappointed. I thought I had a great connection with the other sororities and was sure I would get a bid from one of them. There were houses that I was open and honest with the sisters and shared my struggles with them, connected over shared experiences and hardships, and even shed a tear while they shared with me what their sisterhood meant to them. I was disappointed to know that the sorority women I talked to didn't feel the same connection that I did. But nevertheless, I ran home, signed and accepted my bid, and allowed myself to enjoy the bid day festivities. I continued to trust the recruitment process. I mean, if this is where the process put me then there must be a reason for it. It has now been exactly one year since I accepted my bid and I couldn't be happier that I did. I trusted the process and it put me exactly where I needed to be.
It can be difficult to be so open and honest with people that you have just met to ultimately be rejected by them. Sorority recruitment isn't easy and making it through is quite an accomplishment (especially considering the circumstances brought about by the COVID-19 pandemic) and you should be proud of yourself regardless of who you received a bid from. However, just because you aren't asked back to a house or don't get a bid from a certain sorority DOES NOT mean that they didn't like you! There are countless reasons why someone could be dropped by a house that has absolutely NOTHING to do with them. It is possible that the reason you were dropped by one sorority is that another one wants you even more! If you are dropped by a house that you had great conversations in there is no reason why you can't still have a connection with that woman and pursue a friendship outside of Greek Life.
You need to trust the process. I know it is corny and you've heard it from LITERALLY everyone throughout the recruitment process but it is the truth. Everyone involved with recruitment is just trying to help you find the right fit for you. They have been training for months to perfect recruitment techniques to help you find the right sorority for you. There is a method to the madness that is recruitment. If you get a bid from a certain house there is a reason for it even if you didn't feel a connection between you and the women you speak with during recruitment. Remember that you are only able to speak with a handful of the women in a chapter of over a hundred women. There are likely plenty of other women in the chapter that you would connect with. As a matter of fact, one of the women that I spoke to during recruitment is my bigs roommate and she helped to set us up. I may not have had a connection with her but she knew I would connect more with her roommate. Please, please, please, PLEASE I beg you to just try and trust the recruitment process.
If you really truly feel that you don't fit into the sorority that you received a bid from then you can always decline the bid and participate in continuous open bidding. If you feel as though you had a really great connection with the women in a certain house then you can rush that specific sorority during COB. However, there is no guarantee that the house you want to rush will decide to hold COB. A sororities participation in COB depends on a variety of different factors. But you'll likely know shortly after bid day whether or not a sorority is doing continuous open bidding. If you truly think you've found your home in a different sorority and they are doing COB, then go for it!
The disappointment you feel when you are dropped by a house you loved or receive a bid from a sorority you didn't connect with is valid and real. Allow yourself to feel it and mourn over what could have been but not for too long. Try to have fun and get involved in the sorority. Spend time and connect with your new member class and new sisters. Once you get involved and get to know your sisters you may find that the sorority you received a bid from was right for you all along. Just like I did.
