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15 Infuriatingly Absurd Things That Happen In Movies

Have you ever found yourself watching a movie thinking how absurd something is and that it would have never happened in the real world?

Jenna Wirth

Jan 07, 2019

Syracuse University

295

15 Infuriatingly Absurd Things That Happen In Movies

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Oftentimes, movies fail miserably at depicting the real world. Here are the most 15 unrealistic things that happen:

1. People who brush their teeth without having a mouth full of foam. I don't know about you, but I look like a rabid dog whenever I brush my teeth.

2. People who somehow live outside their income range. Many times people will live in enormou, nice apartments in the middle of a huge city, despite only making a moderate amount of money. I would love to make $50K a year and live in a studio apartment in the middle of NYC.

3. People who miraculously type things perfectly without ever hitting the backspace key. Sorry, that's not possible. I just made like 4 errors just typing this.

4. Ever notice that the 'bad guys' always fight one at a time? That's because if they didn't, the movie wouldn't end happily ever after. The villains would probably win if they had the common sense to attack simultaneously.

5. People just walk into showers as the water is magically hot. I've had to wait for the water to heat up for every shower I've ever taken - even for just 30 seconds - if I don't want my brain to freeze and fingers to become numb.

6. People not having to wait to get coffee or food during the morning rush. During peak times, I always have to wait in a long line for my order, and usually, end up waiting at least 5-10 minutes.

7. People never use condoms or birth control (that we know about). No wonder there are so many teen moms. Uneducated people are being led to infer incorrect things.

8. Characters are always able to snag free, close parking. I don't know about you, but it can be a Sunday afternoon and I'll be fighting with people over a parking space that is a good walk away from the closest entrance at my local mall.

9. High schoolers look like they're in their 20s with their flawless makeup and attractive clothes. Oh wait, in the real world the actors are. You couldn't have hired actors that represent the age they're portraying?

10. Driving with a passenger and barely looking at the road. Oh, and they always get there on time unless being late ties into the storyline. If I had a full conversation looking at a passenger while steering the wheel back and forth I'd end up in a river.

11. Literally everything about sex - before, during, and after. No one's hair and makeup looks that good the next morning. The sheets would never cover each person's body perfectly. No peeing later. No conversation during the act, just groans and moans. No one getting sweaty. No mess. Enough said.

12. Being able to hear someone clearly in any noisy area. I have a hard time hearing every word someones says when it's dead silent.

13. Movies with happy endings. Hate to break it to you, but life isn't a fairy tale. It's shit with pure moments of bliss far and few between.

14. Everyone is hot. Literally. And if they're not, they can be by taking off their glasses. If only...

15. Everyone always has the best comebacks instantly. I stumble over my own words on a good day.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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15 Infuriatingly Absurd Things That Happen In Movies

Have you ever found yourself watching a movie thinking how absurd something is and that it would have never happened in the real world?

1. People who brush their teeth without having a mouth full of foam. I don't know about you, but I look like a rabid dog whenever I brush my teeth.

2. People who somehow live outside their income range. Many times people will live in enormou, nice apartments in the middle of a huge city, despite only making a moderate amount of money. I would love to make $50K a year and live in a studio apartment in the middle of NYC.

3. People who miraculously type things perfectly without ever hitting the backspace key. Sorry, that's not possible. I just made like 4 errors just typing this.

4. Ever notice that the 'bad guys' always fight one at a time? That's because if they didn't, the movie wouldn't end happily ever after. The villains would probably win if they had the common sense to attack simultaneously.

5. People just walk into showers as the water is magically hot. I've had to wait for the water to heat up for every shower I've ever taken - even for just 30 seconds - if I don't want my brain to freeze and fingers to become numb.

6. People not having to wait to get coffee or food during the morning rush. During peak times, I always have to wait in a long line for my order, and usually, end up waiting at least 5-10 minutes.

7. People never use condoms or birth control (that we know about). No wonder there are so many teen moms. Uneducated people are being led to infer incorrect things.

8. Characters are always able to snag free, close parking. I don't know about you, but it can be a Sunday afternoon and I'll be fighting with people over a parking space that is a good walk away from the closest entrance at my local mall.

9. High schoolers look like they're in their 20s with their flawless makeup and attractive clothes. Oh wait, in the real world the actors are. You couldn't have hired actors that represent the age they're portraying?

10. Driving with a passenger and barely looking at the road. Oh, and they always get there on time unless being late ties into the storyline. If I had a full conversation looking at a passenger while steering the wheel back and forth I'd end up in a river.

11. Literally everything about sex - before, during, and after. No one's hair and makeup looks that good the next morning. The sheets would never cover each person's body perfectly. No peeing later. No conversation during the act, just groans and moans. No one getting sweaty. No mess. Enough said.

12. Being able to hear someone clearly in any noisy area. I have a hard time hearing every word someones says when it's dead silent.

13. Movies with happy endings. Hate to break it to you, but life isn't a fairy tale. It's shit with pure moments of bliss far and few between.

14. Everyone is hot. Literally. And if they're not, they can be by taking off their glasses. If only...

15. Everyone always has the best comebacks instantly. I stumble over my own words on a good day.

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?

13. What is your ideal date night?

14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?

15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Can you describe yourself in three words?

18. What makes you the most nervous in life?

19. What's the best gift you have ever received?

20. What do you do to relax/have fun?

21. What are your priorities at this phase of your life?

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

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