I don't remember exactly what this was called, but when I was younger I went to a week long summer camp. The description of the camp, I believe was pretty hazy, but my mom knew it had something to do with arts and crafts, so she signed me up. The premise was that everyone brought in an old book from home that you knew no one would read again. That last part is important because you are going to destroy the book. Not in a Wreck This Journal kind of way, but in a destroy to create kind of way.

Recently I've taken to reading like a maniac, the way I did when I was younger before the loads of homework and extracurriculars took up too much of my time. So I was looking at my bookshelf that has barely been touched in years and I had a flashback of that summer camp. The smell of books, magazines, and glue along with the sounds of scissors and the faint feeling of discomfort I felt at the end of that camp. Since it was only a week long I didn't have nearly enough time to fill every page and when I left the camp I never continued it so I've always felt unsatisfied when I remember that camp.

Then I realized that quarantine is the perfect time to try this project again. With an endless amount of time I could create something that I could be really proud of.

I picked out a book of poetry that I had bought in middle school and started decorating the outside first. Then I went through all the magazines I could find in my house and cut out anything of interest. I found some sharpies and tape and started in.

I want to say that I'm not an artist, since every type of art I try my hand at seems to only turn out ok. But now that I'm older and a bit more aware of how my perfectionist tendencies can be harmful to myself, I think that anyone can be an artist. Art doesn't have to be perfect or even make any sense, just like life, especially right now. So this time when I create my book I'm going to let it flow from within and hold my own judgements back. I will let out my deepest worries and my biggest goals, I will create beautiful and disorganized collages of all the things I love, and I will be proud of it all.

I will destroy this book as a way to destroy my boredom and fear in order to create something for myself. I will create something that will remind me of the jumbled up person that I am, who I sometimes forget.

I think this project could be exactly what I need, and maybe what a lot of you need. A project that could just be to create something beautiful and artistic in a unique way, or a project that will help you learn a little about yourself all while giving you something to focus on during an otherwise very weird time.