50 Joe Kenda Quotes
Start writing a post
Entertainment

50 (More) Joe Kenda Quotes In Honor Of The Last Season Of 'Homicide Hunter'

"I didn't get the chance to shove my gun up this guy's nostril, and that disappoints me."

9888
50 (More) Joe Kenda Quotes In Honor Of The Last Season Of 'Homicide Hunter'
Investigation Discovery

All good things come to an end eventually, and sadly that time has come for Investigation Discovery's "Homicide Hunter: Lt. Joe Kenda." Joe Kenda always has great quotes and one-liners while talking about the cases he worked on over the years. The show is so addicting because of Lt. Kenda's dry sense of humor and blatant answers.

Here are 50 (more) humorous and insightful Lieutenant Joe Kenda quotes all #IDAddicts need in their lives:

1. “This is why humans are so difficult to understand and so dangerous to behold.”

2. “At the beginning of this case, we were chasing ghosts. They’re not ghosts anymore.” 

3. “What could a child possibly say or do that would warrant a violent death? Nothing.” 

4. “It seems that somebody threw James Joseph Perry out of a 10th floor window of an apartment building in the Bronx. And he didn’t mount so good. Well, my, my, my.” 

5. “I’ve always thought there is no such thing as a coincidence. They’re always suspicious. They happen more than once, they become evidence.”

6. “It adds up to one word: suspect. And that, my man, would be you.” 

7. “This is not from a traffic accident. This is not from running into a building. It’s from running into a bullet.”

8. “I’d go back tomorrow, but it’s a young man’s game… And I’m no longer young.”

9. “Cases can go cold. Not because the perpetrator is a genius. Because they’re just lucky.” 

10. “In a case of sexual assault, it’s often ritualistic. The crime has nothing to do with sexual gratification. It’s about the punishment of women." 

11. “He wanted to break up with her anyway, her disappearance has solved that problem for him. That’s his story.” 

12. “I was always annoyed when I was in these budgetary meetings. I signed up to kick doors and pull guns on people, and I’m good at that. I didn’t sign up to read spreadsheets… I looked down at that pager, it said 911, and my thought was “bless you.” I just got out of this meeting."

13. “They run home. Just like they’ve done since the time they were three, they run home.” 

14. “I heard a woman crying. I am a policeman, but I am also a human being, and there’s a natural instinct that you want to help someone in tears.”

15. "That surprised me... I don’t like surprises.” 

16. “The officers try a normal knock, they don’t get a response… So, next, we try a police knock.”

17. “When he said to me this started over a girl, my interest was immediately peaked. The sex drive is a very powerful emotion. More than enough to cause somebody to pull a gun.”  

18. “I didn’t get the chance to shove my gun up this guy’s nostril, and that disappoints me.” 

19. “Come on down. You are the next contestant on ‘The Murder Is Right.’” 

20. “The only thing that Craig is sure of is that he’s reasonably certain this is North America.”  

21. "Emotion: it begins at a high level. Then add some more to it. Add some more disputes, add some more reasons. It doesn’t take long to reach a boiling point.” 

22. “A large caliber weapon leaves an entry wound the size of a dime and exits the size of a cash register.” 

23. “If you lie to me, you don’t make me angry. You insult me. Don’t sit there and think that you’re smarter than me because you’re not.” 

24. “She says, ‘you know why I remember him? …  He was loud, he was profane, that guy was an asshole.’ And I thought, ‘well, I’m looking for one of those.’"

25. "If I can't see your hands, you're gonna see a gun." 

26. "My b.s. alarm is sounding loud and clear… and flashing bright." 

27. “Animals kill for need, humans kill for pleasure.”   

28. “I'm gonna bury you so deep under jail they'll have to pump down sunshine.” 

29. “When your day is as busy as mine is, it’s very difficult to do simple things. I take a moment to make a deposit to cover a check my wife has already written to somebody. And as always the case in drive-ups at a bank, the guy in front of you is passing 14 documents back and forth. You are always behind that guy. Can I just cover my wife’s check?" *gets call* "Well, I guess not.”

30. “…It’s not a bar, it’s not a strip club. That’s all extremely odd.”  

31. “The journey begins with the first step, so you take the first step.”

32. “Children don’t understand death. They don’t know that it’s final, and you can’t fix it. You can’t tell them it’s going to be okay because it’s not going to be okay.” 

33. “There’s gonna be a judgment day. And it happens to be today.” 

34. “Nothing good happens after midnight.” 

35. “I would never raise my voice because it’s more frightening to people:” *calmly* “My name is Kenda from the police department. You are under arrest for murder. If you don’t do what I say, I’m gonna kill you right here and right now.” 

36. “So, who’s the son of a bitch responsible for this?” 

37. “I can’t turn my mind off, and I certainly can’t turn off traumatic memory. You can’t. Like to, love to. You can’t. So I sleep in spurts. Hour or two then I’m up. Toss. Turn. Make my wife insane.”  

38. “There is a deep bruising of the brain tissue, resulting in fractures to various veins and arteries, resulting in goodbye.” 

39. “I wasn’t gonna stop, sleep, eat, or do anything until we have this son of a bitch.”

40. “I feel a sense of rage. And I take it as a personal mission. I am going to find you. And I am going to grab you by the throat. And 12 of your peers are gonna decide what to do with you." 

41. “Now if I was a guy who was gonna start a fire and that fire ignited, I think I’d be running as well.” 

42. “I wasn’t smarter than anybody else. I was just more stubborn.”  

43. “You’re not in here by invitation. You’re at a minimum a material witness, and maybe you’re more than that, so you need to drop the attitude and start talking to me or I’m going to make your life miserable.” 

44. "It's not a crime to act peculiar, but if you act peculiar within 500 feet of a dead body, it piques my interest."

45. "If you want someone to help you cover up a murder, you might wanna pick someone with an IQ higher than...12.” 

46. "Don't monkey with somebody else's… monkey." 

47. "We are here to talk about a homicide, not overnight parking. We aren't going to go away." 

48. "If you're gonna kill someone... make sure they're dead." 

49. "They couldn’t organize a trip to the bathroom.” 

50. "When she's really angry with me, she [his wife] calls me by my last name. And she pointed at me and said, 'Kenda, I can't wait for you to come home anymore.' Yes, ma'am. And that was the end of that. I was there on Friday and I wasn't there on Monday. No ceremony, no nothin'. Good-bye." 

Report this Content
New Year Resolutions

It's 2024! You drank champagne, you wore funny glasses, and you watched the ball drop as you sang the night away with your best friends and family. What comes next you may ask? Sadly you will have to return to the real world full of work and school and paying bills. "Ah! But I have my New Year's Resolutions!"- you may say. But most of them are 100% complete cliches that you won't hold on to. Here is a list of those things you hear all around the world.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Ultimate Birthday: Unveiling the Perfect Day to Celebrate!

Let's be real, the day your birthday falls on could really make or break it.

41766
​different color birthday candles on a cake
Blacksburg Children's Museum

You heard it here first: birthdays in college are some of the best days of your four years. For one day annually, you get to forget about your identity as a stressed, broke, and overworked student, and take the time to celebrate. You can throw your responsibilities for a day, use your one skip in that class you hate, receive kind cards and gifts from loved ones and just enjoy yourself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

Unleash Inspiration: 15 Relatable Disney Lyrics!

Leave it to Disney to write lyrics that kids of all ages can relate to.

60818
The 15 most inspiring Disney songs

Disney songs are some of the most relatable and inspiring songs not only because of the lovable characters who sing them, but also because of their well-written song lyrics. While some lyrics make more sense with knowledge of the movie's story line that they were written for, other Disney lyrics are very relatable and inspiring for any listener.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

The Six Most Iconic Pitbull Lyrics Of All Time

Mr. Worldwide just wants to see you succeed.

79064
a photo of artist Pitbull

It is no secret that Pitbull is a gifted artist, but many fail to remember that he can be a source of great inspiration as well. The following is a list of iconic Pitbull lyrics that we know and love. Read on to feel empowered — if you think you can handle it.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

11 Essential Expectations for Becoming the Ultimate Cheermeister

Mastering Festive Expectations: Tips to Shine as Your Holiday Cheermeister

109660
Crazy for Christmas

So you’ve elected yourself as this year's Holiday Cheermeister, there’s no shame in that. The holidays are your pride and joy, and you've taken on the responsibility to get everyone in the spirit. With only one week until Christmas, here are some things we expect from you, Cheermeister.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments