5 Facts And Questions That WILL Give You An Existential Crisis

5 Facts And Questions That WILL Give You An Existential Crisis

Haven't felt creeped out or insignificant? Worry not! I'm here to help!

Sometimes we all think of things that we wish we didn't. Whether it be the futility of life, you will most likely be forgotten in only a few generations or how sausage and hot dogs are made, everyone has an existential crisis from time to time. Well, don't get to excited, but here are a few other things to keep you up all night! Please, thank me later.

1. What is life?

An age-old question reexamined. Not the meaning of life. What IS life? We have our basic list of things that classify something as alive or not, but as for the actual components of life, all we know is that several non-living things somehow make a living thing. So you're reading this as a living thing made out of trillions of living cells that are made out of zillions upon zillions of non-living things. And this device your reading from is made of the same stuff you are. One small thing separates you from being as alive as this device, and we have no idea what it is.

2. Are there other dead civilizations in the universe?

So we MAY be alone in the universe. But the universe is obscenely old. There could be other planets out there that once sustained life similar to ours but were wiped out, thinking they were the only and the best in the universe. We could be making their mistakes as we speak. And when we eventually die of the nuclear war we initiate with North Korea, life could just start on another planet. Just kidding guys. We're all going to die from an engineered super-virus that escapes from a bioengineering lab.

3. Black Holes

I... jeez. I can't even go into details on this one. It's literally the strangest thing. There's evidence that we could be in a black hole right now. There are arguments that black holes are actually other universes. There are even arguments that black holes are just errors in telescopes and satellites and such. Just...black holes.

4. How many dead things are inside of you?

So we have approximately 10-50 trillion cells in our bodies. Which is bad enough to think you have that many tenants inside of you, but about five million die every second. Which is 300 million per minute. 18,000,000,000 per hour. Feel free to continue calculating. I'd rather not think about how my body is both a cell apartment and a graveyard.

5. We are technically zombies.

Technically, we start dying the moment we are born, though this process is usually called aging. But then we also have to address how are bodies break down over time. This is the definition of decomposition, so we are decomposing as we speak. Zombies are decomposing beings who somehow manage to still function reasonably well. So, welcome to the zombie apocalypse. I have armed you with ways to trouble yourself and anyone you share this info with. Have a lovely day.

Cover Image Credit: Warner Bros. TV

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30 Bee Puns To Get You Through The Day

These puns are as sweet as honey.

There are few things in life that make me happier (and/or make me want to bury my face in my hands and groan loudly) than a well timed pun. This goes double if the pun involves some my favorite insects — bees. There's nothing quite as satisfying as uttering a bee pun when no one expects it, so here is a list of the top 30 bee puns around!

Use these puns to make your grandparents laugh, impress your date, spice up your Tinder profile, make friends with a beekeeper, break the ice at your new job or make everyone in the general vicinity wish they hadn't invited you to come hang out with them. You won't bee-lieve how many of these puns you'll be pollen for! You'll bee-come an instant hit at parties! You'll bee sure to thank me later.

1. "When a bee is in your hand, what's in your eye? Beauty. Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder."

2. "Bee puns really sting.

3. "Who's a bee's favorite singer? Bee-yoncé."

4. "What's a happy bumblebee's blood type? Bee positive!"

5. "Bee puns aren't that great. I don't get what all the buzz is about."

6. "Wasp are you talking about?"

7. "Naughty bee children really need to beehive."

8. "What kind of bees drop things? Fumble bees!"

9. "A bee's favorite haircut is a buzz cut!"

10. "What do you call a bee that's a sore loser? A cry bay-bee!"

11. "What's a bee's favorite flower? Bee-gonias!"

12. "Why do bees get married? Because they found their honey!"

13. "That bee is talking too quietly, it must be a mumble-bee!"

14. "Bee children take the school buzz to get to school."

15. "A bee's favorite sport is rug-bee."

16. "The bees went on strike because they wanted more honey and less working flowers."

17. "On the first day of class, bee students are given a sylla-buzz."

18. "What did one bee say to the other when they landed on the same flower? Buzz off."

19. "Who's a bee's favorite painter? Pablo Bee-casso!"

20. "A bee styles their hair with a honeycomb."

21. "When a bee writes a sonnet, they're waxing poetic."

22. "The worker bee decided to take a vacation to Stingapore last year."

23. "A bee that's been put under a spell has been bee-witched!"

24. "Say, these bee puns aren't too shab-bee."

25. "That pretentious wasp is just plain snob-bee!"

26. "Why did the bee want to use the phone? To say hi to their honey."

27. "A bee's favorite novel is the Great Gats-bee."

28. "What's a bee's favorite Spice Girls song? Wanna-bee!"

29. "What do bees like with their sushi? Wasa-bee!"

30. "Remember, bee puns are good for your health, they give you a dose of Vitamin Bee!"

Cover Image Credit: Fanaru

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6 Things Pet-Less Dog Lovers Know to Be True

Dog-friendly places are your go-to spots, even if you don't have a dog.


If you're like me then you're absolutely obsessed with dogs. However, being a full-time student and working two jobs doesn't grant me the luxury of pet-ownership... yet. So, this is how I cope with trying to include animals in my lifestyle.

1. You learn all the names of the neighborhood dogs, and have your favorites

...And you get withdrawal symptoms when you haven't seen them in a while. There are three golden retrievers who live down my street, one of the families that own the oldest of the three recently adopted a Labrador retriever puppy. Walking by that house every day means that my neck is always craned, hoping for a glimpse of one of them, or seeing if they're outside.

2. You've been known to go to dog parks and dog beaches

Admittedly, it's super weird to go to a playground or kid-oriented place without a child, but when it's a dog, I think people understand that you just need some time around their furry companions. Owners have been understanding or friendly every time I've personally interacted with dogs at these venues.

3. Dog-friendly venues are immediately your favorites

Especially dog meet up events. Once again, the ones I've gone to are open to the public and including the pet-less public. Going to one of these is the equivalent of de-stressing or therapy for me.

4. You try to hang out at people's houses exclusively to be around their pets

Or else, if possible, ask them to bring their pets if they come over to your house. That's not weird, right?

5. You constantly ask for updates about your friends' pets

They're a part of the family too, and so one may ask for updates about a friends' sibling or parents, animal lovers will also inquire about their friends' pets. If your friend owns a pet, it's very likely they'll just give you updates on their own - not that you're complaining.

6. You're WAY too familiar with the question, "Can I pet your dog?"

And easily say it multiple times per day.

In conclusion, you're in a constant state of withdrawal and can't wait until the next time you're out and about to dog spot or interact with other peoples' pets.

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