5 Stupid Ways To Kill Time When You Have An Extra Long Winter Break
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5 Stupid Ways To Kill Time When You Have An Extra Long Winter Break

I'm looking at you, fellow Columbia students.

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5 Stupid Ways To Kill Time When You Have An Extra Long Winter Break
Laslow

This is a special article that goes out to all of the Columbia College Chicago students, and really anyone else that attends a college with an ungodly long winter break. So here we are, a little over halfway through. The first week was great! You were finally done with finals, Christmas was coming so you knew you were probably coming into some money; it was a time to kick back and relax. The second week was cool too, and you probably caught up with tons of your old friends, hit up some of your old hangout spots. You know, typical winter break activities. The third week is were it starts to get old--you get bored, your parents are getting on your nerves, but hey at least your friends are still around! The fourth week is where it all starts going downhill. The universities are starting back up, your friends are moving back to school, your parents are back at work, and here you are, alone and looking at another two weeks of bitter boredom. How can one possibly pass the time? I have a few ideas, albeit maybe slightly unusual ideas, but hey, you're bored and alone; there's no one around to judge you.

1. Find the nearest community college and pretend you go there.

I mean, why not? Walk around, find out where people hang out between classes, and then sit down like you belong. Strike up a conversation with some of the students, and talk mess about how awful one of the teachers is. Be sure to make it a real generic name, like Mr. Johnson or Ms. Scott. Once you've formed some pretty decent acquaintances, sprint away, sprint like a bat outta hell, sprint like you're being chased; don't pause and don't look back. Fair warning, once you get to your car you'll probably feel like an idiot, but I'm sure the adrenaline rush will be all worth it.


2.Pretend like you still go to your old high school.

This one is gonna take hella dedication. So you gotta get up early, dig out some old clothes from high school, and then sneak in with all the other little crumb snatchers. Obviously there's some difficulty with this one, on account of class periods and attendance lists and all that jazz. Look, just hide. While class is going on hide in the bathrooms, in the library, I don't care; just don't get caught by your hall monitors. When class isn't in session bump into your old teachers and act genuinely shocked when they ask if you graduated and say, "No, are you joking?" like they're crazy. At lunchtime attempt to buy lunch with your old pin code and then leave at the end of the day and never show up again. If you really want to go for the gold do this at your old middle school.

3. Pretend to work at Target and be a horrible employee.

Wear a red shirt and beige pants and a "Hello my name is--" tag and just go for it. When customers ask where items are just lead them on really long walks around the store until they get annoyed. Drone on and on about your personal life and when they try to interrupt to ask their question act extremely offended and say, "Excuse you, I was speaking." When people threaten to get the manager dare them to do it and then sprint away, or, you know, wait for the manager to come and act offended when he doesn't recognize you. Either way be careful not to get arrested with this one.


4. Tail someone.


Choose a car and just follow it, no matter where it goes. All day. They're going to the grocery store? So are you. The bank? So are you. Make up a story for them if you need to, like they kidnapped your mother or something and you're on the hunt to get her back. Bonus points if you interact with them at some point, like bump into them in the store and apologize or something. Just don't get caught, because I'm pretty sure this is like, really illegal.


5.Watch Netflix

Just in case you're too much of a punk to do 1-4, here's one for all you sissies out there. Especially since I'd be lying if I said I'm not spending most of my time doing this.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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