I am not a well-established writer. When I was eleven, I made a Wattpad account because I couldn't contain the characters I was creating in my head. I wanted to give them stories that I could write down and keep forever. But there came a point, mostly in high school, when I couldn't write anymore. And if you've ever tried to casually write a story, you've likely gone through these five states.

1. A wave of inspiration

I mention this one first and foremost because it is the most important. Just now, I wrote four chapters of a book I started when I was twelve. I have rewritten the first few chapters countless times, and the characters hang out in my head when I lack the motivation to write. But suddenly here I am, typing for hours, new ideas flowing out. My story even has a plot now. Where did this come from?

2. Wondering where this wave of inspiration came from

Imagine. You've been suffering writer's block for months, even years. You haven't done anything about it because you're only writing the book for yourself, but suddenly you crank out double the writing that your story was to begin with. The characters become more developed, your story even seems to be going somewhere now. And you started this book six years ago.

3. Binge writing in fear that the inspiration will slip away

I spent nearly eight hours sitting at my desk writing yesterday. I wrote three lengthy chapters and gave some direction to the characters. I drew out a plot diagram, avoided my actual homework, and wrote. I get worried that the motivation to write will slip away, leaving me unable to write another chapter for a few more years.

4. The pointlessness of writing only for yourself

Now you see, I love to write. And while it makes me feel a little mental to say, the characters are always hanging out in my head. It feels weird not to write the scenes in my head down on paper. However, I do not need or want anyone, especially people that I know, to read. So, under my false name, I write. Do people see it? Not really. Does it bother me? Maybe a little.

5. Lack of immediate praise

I don't necessarily think I'm striving for the praise of my family of friends, but since I'm posting it online, I feel like it would be nice to get even the slightest feedback. However, since I haven't posted anything in like three years, people aren't exactly engaged in my story. So we end up back at point number four.

Really, if writing gives you a break from the harsh realities of the real world, if writing allows you to escape to a world you've created as its god, then it should be something you allow to take up time. Writing is this for me, and I feel like its nice to have all of these dead ideas cluttering a folder on my hard drive. It allows me to look back on over seven years of content. Which is a pretty cool thing.