25 Unforgettable Snooki Quotes From The Glory Days Of "Jersey Shore"
Politics and Activism

25 Unforgettable Snooki Quotes From The Glory Days Of "Jersey Shore"

There’s more to Snooki than her 4’8” stature, poofed hair, and boisterous attitude.

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MTV

“Jersey Shore,” a staple of 2009-2012 MTV, sadly came to an end after six short seasons.

Finally, five years after the end of the “Jersey Shore” era, MTV announced that they will be bringing back the show for a “Family Reunion.” The original show, full of intoxicated antics and hilarious banter, will definitely not be the same now that the cast members are in serious relationships and have families.

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, arguably one of the most memorable “guidettes,” definitely had her fair share of legendary (and misunderstood) sayings. Most of her interviews consisted of complete nonsense and incoherent gibberish where viewers cannot be exactly sure what she even meant. The seriousness she displayed while saying these things made her a hilarious part of the Jersey Shore fam.

In honor of the show's comeback, here are 25 hilariously quotable things Snooki said throughout her years at the shore:

1. "Is there a moon in this country?"

2. "When people function this early in the morning, this isn't real life to me. I feel like it's a video game."

3. "Wasteypants"

4. "Where's the beach?"

5. "I don’t eat friggin' lobster or anything like that because they’re alive when you kill it, like, that’s disgusting."

6. “After I run for president… the economy would rise, everyone would be tan, and all the radios would play house music.”

7. "Tofu. I thought that was like touché.”

8. "I have no idea how to speak clock language."

9. "I feel like a pilgrim from the frickin' '20s."

10. "I’m heartbroken so let me dance."

11. "I don't know how to read the map because I need glasses."

12. "Everybody Google it because that's why the water is salty."

13. "You can call me burnt toast, Oompa Loompa, orange freak as long as I know that I’m tan.”

14. “I look over and see like hair being pulled and all this sh*t, I’m like oh my god, how do I get in?”


15. "The fact that I can reproduce is very scary."

16. "UTI doesn’t stand for Ultimate Tanning Institute.”

17. "I feel like that's why the lesbian rate is going up in this country."

18. "Every time I get excited I have to poop."

19. "I will f***ing attack you like a squirrel monkey."

20. "Get it all out, freakin' do every sin that you can."

21. "He's got to be Italian because the last name needs to have a vowel in it, and I want my kid’s last name to have a vowel in it.”

22. "I don't hate you, I Just don't want to be friends with you."

23. "But yet, like, veterinarian, like that's my soul."

24. "I don't go tanning, tanning anymore. Because Obama put a 10 percent tax on tanning. And I feel like he did that intentionally for us. McCain would never put a tax on tanning because he's pale, so he'd probably want to be tan."

25. "I'm not trashy unless I drink too much."


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