ABC’s "Bachelor in Paradise" serves to feed "The Bachelor"/"Bachelorette" fans’ addiction to the drama as former members who lucked out on previous seasons gather in Mexico in hopes to find love once again. Through the tears, laughs, kisses, date cards, beaches, tans, alcoholic beverages and fights, a variety of of thoughts run through viewers heads as they see it all.
- So this chick (Ashley I.) seriously brought her sister (Lauren) along? Didn’t know that was a thing. Well, at least they’re not annoying or anything. HA.
- Clare, hun, you’ve been on Juan Pablo’s season of "The Bachelor" and last season’s "Bachelor in Paradise," and based on Monday night’s episode, this season doesn’t seem like it’s going to work out for you either. Perhaps a reality love series with the word “Bachelor” in it just isn’t the right method for you. I’ve seen a lot of eHarmony commercials lately, and one of my friends has been very successful with Tinder dates...maybe it’s time you give something else a try.
- TELL ME THAT CARLY DOESN’T LOOK EXACTLY LIKE JENNA MARBLES FROM YOUTUBE?
- Okay, well, in my opinion, I think she’s actually prettier than Jenna Marbles. But their voices and their mannerisms are strikingly similar, no doubt.
- Hey Mikey, are you sure you didn’t mean to attend the casting event for Jersey Shore?
- Jared’s hot, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Ashley I. took it too far with him and he ripped out his claws, grew fangs, and transformed into a werewolf. He looks like he should be on "Teen Wolf," except for the fact that he’s 26.
- Jade is stunning. And yup, it looks like she isn’t wearing a drop of makeup. Can I be her for just a sec?
- If I were to make a drinking game out of this show, I would get absolutely hammered if I made a rule, “Take a shot every time Ashley I. cries or says she’ll end up alone.”
- I’m pretty sure I’d die of alcohol poisoning if I took a shot every time Ashley I. and Lauren went off on their own.
- Oh! Another drinking game rule: “Down your drink every time the show focuses on an animal crawling around or fumbling with an object while no one seems to notice.” (Ex: raccoon playing with wine bottle, crab crawling on someone’s bedspread, etc.)
- HAHAHA Lauren called herself a “mistress”? What?!
- It’s been 10 minutes and Ashley I. hasn’t cried! Wow! She’s really maturing through this show.
- Ha, just kidding. There she goes. She’s almost as ugly a crier as Kim Kardashian.
- If Kirk and Carly don’t end up together, I will have given up all hope on love. Ugh, now I sound like Ashley I. Gross.
- Is it just me, or did Ashley S. come off like a total bird freak from the first episode? And then out of nowhere, an ambulance arrived to take her to the hospital for reasons that were not specified on the show...but now she seems normal. So do I like her? I don’t know.
- Hey Joe? Yeah, you’re a d**ck and I hope Samantha never shows up. #JusticeForJuelia
- But then again, go home to your kid, Juelia. Why would you leave your two-year-old daughter AGAIN for this show?
- I wonder what Tenley’s IQ is…?
- JJ’s kind of the worst. I can definitely see him floating from week to week without a real relationship but thinking he is. “Oh that guy? He’s not a threat to me at all.”
- Tanner and Jade = goals. End of story.
- WHY DOES JARED KEEP GOING BACK TO ASHLEY I?! CAN’T HE TELL AT ALL THAT SHE’S COMPLETELY NUTS?
- Jonathan or Jason Derulo?
- Honestly, I’d be totally fine having dinner at that place with the walking on water by myself. That whole concept is freaking awesome.
- Only normal person on this show: erp, no one.
- So is there any point to Chris Harrison being on this show? Ugh, I bet he’s getting paid millions just for saying “We will now have a rose ceremony.”
