It’s the moment we’ve all been waiting for… Thanksgiving Break. Midterms just drained you of all emotion and brain cells and you’re ready to stuff your face with... well stuffing. It’s also the moment we’ve all been dreading, family interrogating you about your college life while you’re just trying to dig into casseroles, turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, gravy and cranberry sauce. Here are some questions college Seniors can dread and prepare for on Thanksgiving
1. When are you graduating?
"Hopefully never. Just kidding, hopefully this semester..."
2. What’s your game plan after you graduate?
Probably party for a week, cry, eat my weight in potatoes, morn my college years then give adulting a shot and get a real job while trying not to have a Brittney Spears meltdown.
3. Has college turned you into an alcoholic?
Before I answer that, what qualifies as one sitting?
5. Have you received any job offers yet?
No, apparently a Bachelor's Degree isn't that impressive anymore. Yes, I'm terrified to start a real person job.
6. Are you going to grad school?
Grammy, I sure hope so—I applied to 10 of them.
7. What are you going to Grad School for?
Mostly to increase my chances of getting a job and fattening my future paycheck while digging myself deeper in debt.
8. Have you applied to Grad School?
If you ask about Grad School again I’m seriously going to throw up.
9. Have you taken the GRE yet?
Do you mean did I devote weeks of my social life, brain cells and soul to studying verbal reasoning, quantitative reasoning and analytical writing and taking a four hour "General Test" ? Yes, Yes I did creepy uncle bobby and now my brain is broken.
10.But what job can you get with that major?
Well Aunt Sassy, the one I want thank you very much.
11. Where are you going to live?
Hopefully into a nice apartment near a beach and not back in with my parents.
12. So have your classes been hard?
Dad, Try taking business calc without a calculator
13. How are your grades?
Like so good Cousin Kate. It's almost delicious.
14. What’s your GPA?
I'm honestly afraid to look.
15. Do you have a boyfriend?
Yes Grandma. He is blonde, athletic, fluffy and so cute. His name is Charlie. He's a dog.
16. When are you and so & so getting married?
On our wedding day, whenever that comes, sometime in the future, whenever he proposes, never, I'm gonna die alone
17. Are you going to have kids soon?
No Grandpa, I can barely keep my phone screen not cracked for a month
18. How much debt are you in?
Help me, I'm poor.
19. What do you plan on doing with your life?
Living, Traveling, Changing the World, Eating, Stuff like that, I don't know
20. Are you stressed?
Stressed is an understatement, at this point i'm lucky if I only have 3 panic attacks a day
21. Are you scared?
Almost as scared as I was while watching the election polls
22. Are you ready to be done and graduate from college?
I am so ready to graduate but i'm going to miss my friends, my school and all the memories made here.
23. Wait why are you crying?
Because Mom, I literally can't answer any of these questions because I don't know. It is absolutely terrifying and I just want a second serving so please pass the sweet potato casserole without asking me what I plan on doing after graduation because I don't even know what I'm having for breakfast tomorrow and I really don't want to get tears on my cornbread
24. Who'd you vote for?
*world war 3 starts at the dinner table*
Let's hope your great aunt doesn't ask this so we can all eat pie in peace and avoid this...
25. Do you want seconds?
No matter what questions your family hounds you with on Thanksgiving, just remember they are asking because they care, they love you and they are proud of you. Hang in there and get thirds because you deserve it.
