The 21st century presents interesting opportunities in everyday life; weddings are no different. It can be difficult to navigate through the etiquette of the past to see what extends to today. This is to help you get through this summer's wedding season.
Dress Code
Most weddings today do not follow a formal dress code, but in case they do, here’s a breakdown of what to wear and when.
White Tie
This is the most formal attire for weddings, and is mostly uncommon. If you do find yourself invited to a white tie wedding, he should wear a tuxedo-a long black jacket with tails, cummerbund or vest and bow tie, black dress shoes and white gloves for dancing. She should wear a full length, formal ball gown in a neutral color; glamorous hair and makeup would be most appropriate.
Black Tie
Black tie is much more common than white tie and is a formal affair. He should wear a tuxedo, including cummerbund and bow tie. She should wear cocktail dress or long evening gown, in a neutral color. Any questions about appropriate dress length, cocktail or evening gown, can be directed to the bride and the wedding part.
Formal/Black Tie Optional
While this can be considered less formal thank black tie, he could still wear a tuxedo. Otherwise, he should wear a formal suit and tie. She should wear a long dress or cocktail dress, again in a neutral tone.
Semiformal/Dressy Casual
Time of day will determine how formal or casual you can dress. Early afternoon can be more casual while the later the evening goes, your attire should become more formal. He should wear a suit and tie, the color depending on the time of day-lighter for the afternoon, darker for the evening. She should wear a cocktail dress or a dressy skirt and top.
Casual
Casual does not mean anything goes as one may assume. Jeans, shorts or tank tops are off limits, as this a wedding-if this is somehow appropriate wedding attire it will be noted on the invitation as acceptable. Casual really means business casual. He should wear dress pants with a button-down shirt or polo. She should wear a sundress or skirt with a blouse.
Unless otherwise stated, you should not wear white to wedding. It is the bride’s day to wear white. Use both the season and time of day to determine appropriate colors to wear. Spring and summer call for lighter colors, while fall and winter call for darker colors. Early afternoon should have light colors, with your clothing getting darker the later the wedding falls during the day. You should also not wear the same colors are the bridal party.
Weddings are meant to be classy affairs, that being said, under no circumstances would club-wear be appropriate. As a general rule, if you would not want your grandma to see you wearing it, then you should not wear it to a wedding. You will inevitably be in photographs that bride and groom are going to have for the rest of their life, you do not want to look out of place because of what you are wearing.
Smart Phones at the Wedding
During the ceremony and during dinner, you should put your phones away and make sure they are on silent. Both wedding services held in places of worship and elsewhere, should be given your undivided attention and there’s no need to have your phone out and in your hand.
While you may think you’re an excellent iPhone photographer, please put your phone down and let the professionals do their jobs. It has become an all too common affair the amateur photographers and their phones have gotten in the way of professionals at weddings. So please, for the bride and groom, stay out of the photographers way and enjoy the wedding without feeling like you need to capture every moment in a picture.
Social Media
Not only does posting to any type of social media during the ceremony distract you from the ceremony/reception, it is disrespectful to the bride and groom. Not only are you advertising the event to those are were uninvited, you are also posting images to those who could not attend. There may be relatives unable to attend the ceremony that the bride and groom would like to share images with themselves. It would be unfortunate for you to post a gritty cell phone picture, ruining the moment for the bride and groom.
Wedding Hashtag
The exception to the above rule, is when the bride and groom have encouraged you to photograph the affair, often using a wedding hashtag. Even when using the wedding hashtag, I would steer away from posting any pictures of the bride and groom immediately after the ceremony. This is their moment to post such images and you don’t want to post anything before they would have a chance to post themselves.
When to Bring a Date
Does your invitation specifically say your name, plus one? No? Then you cannot bring a date. While there is etiquette on situations in which you should be given a plus one, it is ultimately up to the bride and groom to decide who they invite to their wedding. It would be disrespectful to add someone to your RSVP or to show up with an uninvited guest.
