20 Life Lessons You Should Learn By The Time You're 20
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20 Lessons From The 20 Years That I've Lived Thus Far

Reflecting on important moments is pretty important, especially when you ~finally~ hit the fabulous twenties.

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20 Lessons From The 20 Years That I've Lived Thus Far
Skylar Meyers

Another year, another birthday.

It's crazy when you are growing up that you can't wait to turn a year older. They always tell you that you don't want to rush it but as children usually do, you don't listen to your parents (me included).

Upon turning twenty this year, I wanted to reflect back on twenty things and life lessons that have resonated with me so I decided to create a list of the most important lessons that I've learned so far.

1. Be you.

It does nothing for you to not be who you are.

I know it becomes annoying for people to say "Just be yourself" but it is true.

Be who you want to be.

2. If they wanted to, they would have.

Nothing speaks louder than the actions that people do, or don't do for that matter.

I saw this tweet on Twitter the other day and I couldn't believe how relatable it was.

This can go for any of your relationships — if they wanted to, they would've. Please try to learn this early because believe me, it would have saved me a ton of heartbreak.

3. Going to the movies by yourself is OK.

The first time I did this, I thought I was the lamest human being on the planet.

But I was going through a lot and really needed a getaway. I thought I would show up and people would stare and make comments but it was honestly one of the most relaxing experiences I have ever had.

4. Don't be afraid to talk to people when you don't know anyone.

I still have some issues with this one since we all have become shy for some reason.

You just have to remember that most people are in the same boat as you.

5. Dance like nobody is watching.

So what if you end up on Old Row? I mean it's not like it will be there forever... right?

6. Don't punish yourself for cheat days if you are on a special lifestyle or diet.

The first thing that comes to mind for this is Hannah Montana's "Everybody Makes Mistakes."

Because it's true.

You can make mistakes and it will always be better to have a good relationship with food instead of beating yourself up every time you mess up.

7. Don't ditch your friends for that SO

Though I feel like I have done pretty good with this (call me out homies if I haven't), you need people who love you and support you to clean up the pieces if the relationship goes sour.

For those who haven't experienced heartbreak let me tell you, it sucks. But as long as you have those homies who have your back, it will be a-OK and I promise that you will get through it.

8. Naps and/or hot showers make everything better

Sure, you will stress the f*&$ out after that supposed to be one hour but turned into a four-hour nap, but at least you will be well rested.

9. "You never stop loving."

I was sent this recently and I think that it really does put life in perspective. The question was if you could ever stop loving someone and I found this amazing response on Quora that I just can't get out of my head.

"The answer is quite simple really. You never stop loving. Once you love someone honestly, truly, you will never be able to un-love them. You only find someone you will love more. At that time, your old love will not feel so strong, but it is a heart, it will never let you forget something that ever made you happy. So don't force yourself to stop loving altogether, you will automatically find someone/something you will love more."

I have had a few boys break my heart but honestly, I have to thank them and although I still love them somewhere in my heart, I owe them thanks for shaping me into the person that I am today.

10. Turn the other cheek, even if it hurts

This one has taken me a while but I have been hurt a lot by the people in my life, so much so that I honestly have trust issues because of it now.

But you just have to pick yourself up and turn the other cheek and hope for the best. People make mistakes.

11. If they hurt you once shame on them. If they hurt you twice, then really shame on them

Yes, I know I changed the original quote but let me tell you. I'm all about giving people second chances. So no, not shame on me if you hurt me twice. Shame on you for taking my generous second chance and flushing it down the toilet. (unfortunately, I sometimes give fifth and sixth chances, but you know sometimes it takes people a few tries to get themselves together.)

12. Never, ever have an important discussion or a huge fight over text messages or social media

Not only does this not work out for anyone, it just gets more people involved (so you add lots of opinions all at once).

This has ruined relationships and friendships not only for me but for several friends as well. I know it can be scary to have those intense discussions in person but it's easier to see what others are feeling during the discussion as well (99.9% of them are as nervous as you).

13. Bullies don't end in high school, college, or even in the real world

See, everyone has this notion that people won't bully each other after middle school and then you get to high school and you're like, "OK this is fine, Once I get to college no one will bully me" but then the same thing can/ does happen in college.

Truth be told, there are bullies out there and you just have to ignore them. It sucks, believe me, but I promise it's just another hiccup in the road.

14. He's just not that into you

This entails to other messages above, but if someone truly likes you then they are going to try to get your number or Snapchat (how romantic).

And that person is going to make the effort. And if he doesn't? Well, Good Luck Charlie.

15. You don't have to talk to your friends every day to stay friends but don't just ditch them

This has been a big thing for me, especially in college. So many of my friends are spread out throughout the state and the country that it's hard to stay in touch but every once in a while, remember to pop them a text or send them a card. It takes literally 3 seconds of your day (3!!!!) for you to pop a quick hi message.

Believe me, it will make their day. We all are struggling with school or work or family life but, get this, so are our friends.

16. It was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all

I think this is a really important one. We all have so many relationships with boyfriend/girlfriends, family, friends, and even beloved pets.

Even though we could have lived without some of these experiences, I genuinely believe that it is better to have had that experience in life than to never have been able to experience it at all.

17. Throwing pillows at your bedroom door is a lot better than yelling at someone (in the long run)

You do not want to burn all of your bridges at once so if you get angry at someone, instead of freaking out at them and saying things you probably don't mean, just throw your pillow at the door.

It surprisingly helps a ton.

18. If you need a really good laugh, go look up ubarndictionary.com and go through their quotes

Sometimes I laugh with my friends so much at something on there.

19. Family & pets are willing to help

Don't be afraid to ask for help. Someone is always willing to be there for you.

20. Real sad girl hours apply to boys too.

Don't fall for it. Guys do cry and especially at real sad boi hours. But also don't fall for that ex that sends off a real sad boi hour text because he is rethinking life. It's not worth the real sad girl hours that will come from it (believe me).

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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