Whether your favorite spot is Darby's, Union, River, Rennies, Mahoney's or *shudder* Hyde, there's a pretty standard pre-bar process that Marist students, especially your basic Marist girls, know all too well. (Not that I'm old enough to go to bars or anything, but if I were, I can only assume it would go like this.)
1. Thinking about going to the bar
You’ve been waiting all week for socially-acceptable drinking days, and they’ve finally arrived! Sitting in class, you pass the time by thinking about how great Darby’s sounds for tonight.
2. Deciding you’re not going out
But wait, your bank account has been kinda low lately, and it is Harry Potter weekend. And isn’t it supposed to be really cold tonight?!
3. Deciding you're going out
With help from your friends, you remember that money was meant to be spent, you've seen all the Harry Potter movies like 18 times, and once you have a liquor blanket on the cold won’t be so bad. Yep, you’re going out.
4. Picturing what you’re going to wear
5. Trying it on and quickly picking something else
It's even worse than you could have imagined. Guess your favorite LBD is gonna have to cut it tonight.
6. Hair and makeup
Naturally, you and all of your friends squeeze around the same sink and mirror. A true bonding experience.
7. Asking your roommate 'does this look okay?!' a million times ![]()
Okay, but are you SURE I don’t look fat??
8. Pictures ![]()
Pictures, and pictures everywhere. In front of your living room wall, in the dorm hallway, in the bedrooms, in the bathroom mirror. The limit does not exist.
9. Pre-gaming ![]()
It’s like how professional athletes warm up before games. Except you’re not a professional athlete, and your warm up is Svedka and red Gatorade.
10. Realizing you don’t have any cash ![]()
Really, who doesn’t want to start their night on line for the Donnelly ATM????
11. Pictures ![]()
More than ten minutes have passed without a picture, which means it’s time for more pictures.
12. Getting a cab ![]()
Pure talent is scouting out your favorite driver in the dark and copping a $2 ride without having to wait.
13. The cab ride
Step one, get the aux cord. Step two, more selfies.
14. Seeing the line wrapped around the building
"If I wait in this line and don't get in I swear to God I'm going to lose my sh*t" -every Marist girl at one point in time
15. Walking into the bar ![]()
You did it! You're in! Now quickly, run to the bartender and order your vodka cranberry before you lose your buzz.
