Being mixed is something I've taken pride in. What's cooler than getting to know the best of multiple cultures? I love getting to share my experiences with every part of my culture and show people that there is more to me than meets the eye. However, there's always people that are so perplexed by the idea of someone being more than one race. My whole life I've been judged based on appearances and what being just a part of each race means. So I've compiled a list of some of the most ignorant things people say to me all the time.
1. What are you?
I'm pretty sure I'm a human being, what about you? I hate this question because it not only makes being mixed seem like something unnatural, but it lets me know that this person is identifying me as my race and not my personality.
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2. Where are you REALLY from?
A lot of people assume I'm foreign, so when I tell them I'm from South Carolina originally and live in North Carolina they try to dig deeper. "Where are you really from? Like what's your nationality?" The answer is American and really freaking annoyed.
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3. Is your hair real?
This is honestly the most annoying thing someone could ask me. Yes, my hair is real, but even if it weren't it would be none of your business. If a woman feels confident in synthetic hair or any type of hair that is not growing naturally out of her scalp, she has every right to wear it.
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4. You talk white.
Say this to me and I will end you. I will literally make it my life's mission to destroy everything good in your life. Proper English is not white dialect. That's not a thing. My personality and the way I speak cannot be a race so stop trying to make it one.
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5. You're totally an oreo.
This is a superficial judgement that makes assumptions based on my skin color. Just because I'm brown does not mean I have to act a certain way, and, as I said before, my personality is not a race. I do not "act white." I act like me.
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6. Yeah, the mom is always white.
Really... Really... Just because that is my experience, that doesn't mean you should act like it is everyone else's. Plus, this statement makes a judgement against both races which is extremely inappropriate.
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7. So are you into white or black guys/girls?
I'm into whoever makes me happy. Their skin color doesn't matter and implying that it does is offensive toward my character.
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8. You're kind of dark/light for a mixed person.
I didn't know we were all supposed to look the same. Thanks for letting me know!
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9. Are you adopted?
I get it. It's confusing when people see me with my white mom and my white stepdad, but that's no reason to make assumptions. It's honestly not that strange for someone of a different skin tone to be related to certain races. Crazy, right?
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10. Do you have relatives in Africa (or another country based on your race)?
Yes, I have been asked this. It didn't end well.
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11. So do you take offense to the "N" word?
Yes. Particularly when someone is saying it to be offensive...
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12. What will your kids look like if you marry a *insert race here* person?
Do you have a time machine? Because I'm pretty sure the only way to know what my children will look like is to travel to the future and have a peek.
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13. Which side do you identify the most with?
I'm made up of more than one thing, and since it's all a part of me I don't get to pick and choose which parts to identify with.
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I understand the curiosity. It's human nature to ask about things we don't understand, but the issue is that asking certain questions about being biracial comes across as ignorant and racist. Your questions are based off of racial assumptions, and it's not my job as a minority to correct you.