My mother never made it to five feet tall and my dad isn’t very tall either so I knew I was destined to be short. The day the doctor told me I finally made it to five feet tall was definitely one of the greatest days of my life. With my genetics, I didn’t think the day would come.
Obviously short people are the best (no offense to the tall people in the world). However, despite being the best, we go through a lot of struggles being vertically challenged.
1. When people say, “wow, you’re really short”
I love the people who feel the need to say this. As if I have no idea how tall I am. Really? I’m short? This is news to me.
2. Top-loading washing machines
I absolutely hate top-loading washing machines. I always end up diving in to reach the clothes at the bottom.
3. Trying to reach anything on the top shelf
We short people are masters of climbing on counters, the shelves in grocery stores, and whatever else we need to reach stuff on the top shelves.
4. Trying to see at a general admission concert
I always end up spending the whole night on my tiptoes trying to catch the tiniest glimpse of the band or artist I came to see.
Even when I buy jeans that are labeled “short” they still bunch up at my ankles. The struggle is real. I always have to cuff my jeans.
6. Meeting height requirements
One day I almost didn’t meet the height requirement to ride the go-karts at a kids play center. The guy stared at me for a second and then asked me if I was able to reach the pedals. My eleven-year-old cousin was tall enough to ride them no questions asked.
7. “Good things come in small packages”
I don’t ever want to hear someone say this to me ever again.
8. Trying to get served at a bar
Bars are crowded and it’s very easy for short people to get lost in a crowd. I feel like I practically need to send up a smoke signal to get the bartenders attention. On the flip side of this, sometimes I think they see me just fine they are just probably thinking, “Why is this 12 year old at a bar?”
9. Drive up ATMs
I actually have to get out of my car to use the ATM. I can’t reach the buttons if I’m sitting in my car.
10. When people think it’s their right to put their arms on your head and lean on you
Do taller people see shorter people and think, “wow I must lean against that short person”. Because I’m pretty sure that’s how it goes down. Word of advice, don't do this to me. It makes mad.
11. Being at armpit-height of everyone on public transportation
As if public transportation doesn’t smell bad enough, we have to smell everyone’s BO along with the general stench of public transport. Being at armpit-height means we also struggle with holding on to the handles that were intended for average sized people.
12. When you sit down and your feet don’t touch the ground
Personally, this is the most embarrassing one. I always feel like I’ve gone from 22 to 12 when my feet don’t reach the ground when I sit down. What’s worse than sitting in a chair that’s too tall? Sitting on one of those abnormally tall toilets and having your feet not touch the ground. Let me tell you, that’s really freaking weird.
Short people struggles are very real. So thank you to all of the tall people in the world who help us out. And to all my short people out there, I hope you continue to be small but mighty.