School, no matter what age you are, is filled to the brim with essays. Every single class seems to have a million essays that you need to write.

Well, I’m sick of it. I would rather do literally anything else.

1. Pet a cactus

I love cacti so much, but they’re very sharp. Can I pet one instead of writing 3,000 words on nothing?

2. Eat an entire jar of mayonnaise

I’m allergic to mayonnaise. I would gladly spoon some down right now.

3. Run a marathon

I can’t run very fast, but that would be more fun than staring at this computer for one more second.

4. Say/do something embarrassing in front of my crush

I could trip over nothing and land on my face in front of them and that would still be better than writing an essay.

5. Take a cold shower in the winter time

It’s extremely cold out, but I would love to jump in a cold shower and just stand there.

6. Cut my own hair

I tried doing that when I was little, and it did not go well. The same result would probably happen this time around.

7. Listen to screamo music

Screamo music is my least favorite type of music, but I would gladly blast some Pierce the Veil if it meant I didn’t have to write one more word.

8. Learn a new language

Teach me some Spanish grammar rules, as long as I don’t have to write any essays!

9. Date my ex

We broke up for some horrible reasons, but I would take him back in a heartbeat if it meant I could stop writing right now.

10. Read an entire book series

Throw an entire book series at me. I’ll finish it tonight as long as I don’t have to finish this essay.

11. Have head lice

Head lice are extremely itchy and uncomfortable, but it beats having my hand cramp up from typing so much.