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10 Thoughts You Have While Applying to Internships

I'll just apply to three more today...

Grace Gilbert

Jan 26, 2020

The University of Alabama

10 Thoughts You Have While Applying to Internships

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If you're a rising Junior or Senior, (or sophomore in the case of being incredibly ambitious) you're likely frantically looking for a Summer Internship. That means that on top of keeping up with your normal studies, work, volunteering, and brunch plans, you're also checking LinkedIn like your life depends on it and writing countless cover letters where you describe just why you would like to work for people for free!

But it's kind of exciting right! I mean what's better than being paid in experience? If you're in the media field like me, you might be looking for your very own Miranda Priestly to walk all over you.

You are probably also compiling a working list of everyone you know who has ever had a job and if you can ask them for help, but you are hoping to get something on your own though. Or maybe not, you little Paris Hilton, you!

1. LinkedIn, you’re a petty b*tch

As useful as you are, nobody asked you how many other applicants there were. Did I really need to know that one thousand others applied? I feel really good about this now, thanks.

2. Is my Resumé even good?

I struggled fitting this all on one page, but like did I even do anything? Why am I not allowed to say I was a Girl Scout until 5th grade? I feel like everyone needs to know that.

3. Are they even going to look at this?

I am just picturing myself being thrown into a trash bin.

4.Why is everyone asking me to immediately interview?

Ughhhhh I can't be there right now. I'm in school! I thought this was in the Summer and also why are you so opposed to a FaceTime interview?

5. LinkedIn “Easy Apply” is addictive.

When all I have to do is make a few clicks, how do I stop? Is there a program to wean me off of this?

6. Is this Internship even real?

It is important to be discerning. Why are they trying to make me watch this video before I apply. This is strange, back to "Easy Apply" I go.

7. Everyone is really pushing this “no coffee” mantra.

If I had a dollar for every company that says "don't worry, you won't just be getting coffee." Well, I wouldn't need to get an internship. First of all, I'd like to point out that this does not negate the idea that I will indeed be getting coffee, this statement just clarifies that it won't be the only thing I'm doing. Honestly could I opt out of the other stuff? Coffee and further responsibilities seems like a lot of work. Some companies are bold enough to say "you won't be getting coffee." And I'll be taking a printout of that statement right over to the legal department when Steve asks me to go get him a grande chai latte every Monday!

8. How am I going to get clothes for this?

Do you ever just feel like you need to find out who the sons are of the owners of White House Black Market and start dating them ASAP? I have one pair of work pants to my name. One.

9. I really hope I get one

I want to do something cool. I want my parents to understand why we are paying for college. I want this to make it into the Christmas letter, ya know?

10. LinkedIn you petty b*tch

"We found jobs at Chipotle Mexican Grill and 6 others you may be interested in." The audacity. I love Chipotle, and nothing against anyone who works there (although I do kind of have a weird time every time I go in there like the one time a guy there asked me if my burrito was rolled tightly enough and I felt like we weren't talking about burritos), but I am not on LinkedIn to try to get a job at Chipotle. It's like they know I am not going to get any of these fancy ones and are offering me a back up plan as we speak. Maybe I should just go work there so I can get an inside connection to officially start my petition to stop charging extra for guac.

Well, if you're applying for internships good luck.Just don't apply to any of the ones I'm applying for, thanks. If you're reading this and I've applied to your internship, I was joking about applying to so many, yours was the only one I cared about, I promise!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

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Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

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Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

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You cannot beat the beach. Believe it or not (which many people may not), New England has a long and beautiful coastline. Most of my high school summers were spent sitting on the Wall at Hampton Beach, getting sunburnt and eating Acai bowls from The Secret Spot. The Wall was the place to be both during the day and at night. We begin our days there with a KB's bagel and coffee, and end them with pizza and ice cream. It’s not a New England summer without that 4 p.m. text from someone, “Who wants to meet at the Wall tonight?” Nighttime is for Tripoli’s Pizza, the sound of waves, and wishes on shooting stars. Wednesday nights are especially important, as those are the nights that Hampton Beach sets off the weekly firework display.

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10 Thoughts You Have While Applying to Internships

I'll just apply to three more today...

1. LinkedIn, you’re a petty b*tch

2. Is my Resumé even good?

3. Are they even going to look at this?

4.Why is everyone asking me to immediately interview?

5. LinkedIn “Easy Apply” is addictive.

6. Is this Internship even real?

7. Everyone is really pushing this “no coffee” mantra.

8. How am I going to get clothes for this?

9. I really hope I get one

10. LinkedIn you petty b*tch

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Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

Coors Light Summer Brew:

Leinenkugel Summer Shandy

Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat

Sam Adams Summer Ale

Hell or High Watermelon

Blue Moon Summer Honey

LandShark Lager

Corona

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

12. "Cheers to the freakin weekend.”

13. “Love’s a game. Wanna play?”

14. “You don’t know about me, but I bet you want to.”

15. “Let’s set each other’s lonely nights, Be each other’s paradise.”

16. “Trippin’ on skies, sippin’ waterfalls."

17. “Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days.”

18. “But you will remember me for centuries.”

19. “Something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman."

20. “Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me.”

21. “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

22. “Find me where the wild things are.”

23. “I’m high on lovin’ you.”

24. “If you’re gonna be somebody’s heartbreak, somebody’s mistake, if you’re gonna be somebody’s first time, somebody’s last time, be mine.”

25. “Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled on.”

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

1. "Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real Spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)

2. "It's a town full of losers/ I'm pulling out of here to win" (Thunder Road)

3. "You've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" (Tunnel of Love)

4. "I got something in my heart/ I been waitin' to give/ I got a life I wanna start/ One I been waitin' to live" (Leah)

5. “God have mercy on the man/ Who doubts what he’s sure of” (Brilliant Disguise)

7. “Is a dream a lie when it don’t come true, or is it something worse?” (The River)

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Want to know more about summer destinations?

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1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)