If you're like me, you struggle with fitting in and being comfortable in social situations. Especially if you thrive on being that loud, obnoxious, and center-of-attention girl behind closed doors. Anybody who is close to me can tell you that I'm super fun and love to be the life of the party, but my social angst prevents me from doing this in public settings. So here is a list of 10 things that my extroverted heart wants to tell you, but my introverted mind forbids it.
1. Don't invite me to things.
I mean of course I want to go, but unless you want me to have an ultra panic attack, please don't. And don't get mad if I do not show up. If you invite me somewhere, you will probably have to drag me out screaming. But in the end, I'm always glad that I go because I always have a great time.
2. No, I'm not avoiding you.
Well, not in the sense that you're probably thinking. I avoid situations where I have to deal with any kind of human contact.
3. I'm not rude.
I'm really a nice person (unless I love you, then I'm the most horrible person and I'll insult you continuously.)
4. I'm not a douchebag.
The reason I don't talk to you is because I'm such an awkward individual and any kind of social interaction shuts my mind completely down. Odds are, I have forgotten who I am, how to talk, and what the color purple looks like.
5. DO NOT (for the love of God) CALL ME.
I will stress this until the day I die (at least then I can't get a call if I'm dead.) This is the one sure way to raise my heart rate to 225, send me straight into an anxiety-induced coma, just straight up kill ya' girl. So please just send me a text (which still gives me hella anxiety btw), at least then I'll able to think out a decent response.
6. Please do not randomly visit me.
I will literally have a heart attack. I have to mentally prepare myself for any kind of stimulation, and a heads up would be greatly appreciated and needed. Feel free to leave me a little note, though! I love little notes.
7. Do not force me to talk to people
If you think putting me out of my comfortable zone will cure me of my social anxiety, you are wrong. If anything, it will just make it worse and I will fall deeper into the abyss of human contact avoidance.
8. Do not make me feel obligated to go somewhere or do something.
Please give me an option of attendance. I also have a tendency to never say "no" if I'm not given heads up, so I feel obligated to do something, which in turns becomes a bad experience. If I feel uncomfortable, I'll say anything to get out of the situation.
9. Don't assume I'm boring.
"Boring" is the last thing I am. So if you can manage to look passed the anxiety, the RBF, and the crippling dread of existence, I'm actually a really fun and lovable person!
10. I'm not shy... just introverted.
There is a major difference between being shy and being introverted. I have a very outgoing and fun personality but I prefer to keep to myself and the quiet of my own loudness, so I'm not shy--I could care less what you think--I just prefer limited interaction and zero people.
So for all you introverted extroverts and socially awkward individuals out there--this goes out to you! May your inability to fit in never damage your ability to be happy!