Ever since my mom took me to get some "natural" blonde highlights, and I heard the hairdresser say "oh shit" because she accidentally bleached the living crap out of my hair, I was hooked.
Yes, I use three conditioners in the shower and cry when I have to put heat on my hair, but I wouldn't trade it for all of the healthy, long beautiful hair in the world. I have had my fair share of toner-disasters and spent days soaking my hair in all the products that claim to make it softer, or less dry - which, as I have discovered are lies.
Here's to all my girls that wash their hair once a week and think the TSA's "quart-sized bag" rule is a cruel joke.
1. Not washing your hair
Yes, I just bleached my hair - no I'm not washing it for the next two weeks. Honestly, since being blonde my hair rarely needs to be washed, unless I work out. Any bleach blonde knows that washing your hair every day is a thing of the past, and has a stockpile of dry shampoo.
2. Having to bring your own shampoo to hotels
Oh, that's cute, you think I can use hotel shampoo? Haha. I had to check a bag full of products just to keep my hair from falling out. Do you honestly think I can fit all my products in a quart sized bag? TSA guidelines are responsible for my inability to post any throwback pictures to my Hawaiian vacation because my hair made me look like the lion from The Wizard of Oz.
3. Fighting with your hairdresser
No TRUST ME Linda, my hair is totally healthy enough to bleach white. Yes, I brought a picture of Draco Malfoy for reference.
4. The purple shampoo gamble
Buying a new purple shampoo and accidentally turning your hair purple because the last shampoo you used took 5 minutes to tone.
5. Swimming pool? Hah.
Oh honey no. Green hair is the least of your worries when it comes to chlorine. Even a splash and I'm running for the deep conditioner.
6. Wanting to go back to dark hair
When you think about going back to your darker hair because it was so healthy - that is the devil talking, don't listen. Schedule another hair appointment.
7. You share a special connection with the word "hay"
Farmers should honestly start baling my hair cause it literally feels like hay until it is straightened.
8. Chopping it all off
Admit it, we've all said screw it and chopped all of our hair off because it was just that bad.
9. Convincing people not to do it
I've gotten into actual fights trying to convince my dark haired friends not to bleach their hair. It WILL be orange, and no amount of toner will save you then. This is not a road you want to go down.
10. Looking absolutely fabulous
No hate to the ladies rocking the brown and red tresses, but when they say blondes have more fun, they're not kidding.
