Well, folks, it’s that time of year again. The Thanksgiving feast is just around the corner. I know I’m counting down the days until I’m sitting in front of creamy mashed potatoes, homemade stuffing, sweet cranberry sauce, and a big, juicy turkey.
However, there is one thing all college students dread about this thankful holiday: the questions.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s easier to study for the finals just around the corner than it is to answer the prying questions of my loving friends and family. I guess I’ll find out in a few weeks. So, my lovely 20-something-year-old pals, let’s review the 10 questions we will definitely hear at Thanksgiving dinner this year.
1. How are your grades looking?
NOT GOOD, FAM, NOT GOOD. Thanks for reminding me I have finals to go back to after this lovely holiday!
2. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Nope. No, I do not. I am still single. I always have been. Looking like I always will be. Again, thank you SO much for the reminder, though!
3. What are your summer plans?
Uh… an internship? If anyone wants to hire this unqualified and inexperienced girl? Or maybe abroad? I don’t know, dude?!?!?
4. Where do you see yourself after graduation?
Oh, probably living at home because no one hires Millenials these days, Grandpa.
5. Oh, you’re still an *insert major here* major?
Yes. I am still an English major. Yes, I know I won’t make as much money as a doctor. Yes, I am okay with it. No, I don’t want your opinion on it.
6. Do you have a job yet?
Ask me again, tomorrow, Dad. Maybe by then, one of the many places I have dropped resumes off with will call me back!
7. How are the college parties these days?
Um, they’re fine. I guess. But thanks for telling me about how you used to be able to shotgun a beer in under 6 seconds, Uncle Jerry.
8. Are you taking care of yourself?
Does it LOOK like I am taking care of myself, Aunt Lisa?????? No. It looks like I have aged 13 years in six months.
9. Remember that one really embarrassing thing you did when you were a kid?
Thanks, Mom. The whole table needed to know about when I peed my pants in fourth grade. Really. Thanks.
10. How are you feeling about the current political state of our nation?
Well. This conversation needs to end before it can even start.