I’ve always had a bit of a rough relationship with my hair. Both my parents have very curly and very thick hair, and I’ve been given those same genes. However, both of them deal with it very differently than I do. It’s no secret that curly hair can be nearly impossible to manage, and it’s hard for a lot of busy people to spend time on their hair.

My dad keeps his close-cropped, opting for super short hair that never needs any attention – hair that looks fine when he rolls out of bed every morning. My mom keeps hers straightened, instead choosing to use heat every day to turn her own curly head into a sleek bob. I tend to wear mine long and curly, but that something I’ve only just started to do.

I definitely had a period of time where I straightened my hair daily, and I only tried to convince my mom to let me shave my head – something I’m very glad she said no to, because now I don’t think I could bear it if my hair was short. Letting my hair down and my curls out haven’t always been my go-to style, but I’m so glad it’s become it. Though still not perfect, I’m much happier with my hair like this. Here are ten tips for curly hair that helped me get where I am today.

1. Never brush it.

My hair always looks so much better when I stay away from bushes. The many bristles tend to break up curls and separate them, creating a ton of frizz. Instead, I stick to wide tip combs, only using smaller ones when my hair is wet.

2. Become a morning showerer.

Okay, this one took me a long time to get used to, but now I’d never switch it for anything else. Not only does it wake me up in the morning, but I can let my hair dry without flattening it with a pillow first.

3. Sleep in a bun.

On that note, putting your hair up at night can decrease morning tangles.

4. Scrunch, don’t rub.

When drying your hair, always scrunch it in your hand wrapped around a towel, rather than rub it. Rubbing it will break already forming curls and create frizz. If you can, consider switching your towel out for a cotton t-shirt.

5. Protect your hair from heat.

Air dry your hair whenever possible, and when using a blow drier, use a diffuser so all the heat isn’t concentrated in one place. When using a straightener, use a heat protecting spray.

6. Don’t be afraid of leave-in products.

While gels, oils, and leave-in conditioner can make straight hair look greasy, giving the extra moisture to curls can help them immensely. These products help shape curls and help control frizz.

7. Rinse with cold water.

On your final rinse in the shower, use cold water instead of hot. This will help retain moisture and won’t flatten your gorgeous curls!

8. Avoid conditioner on your roots.

This trick really helped me. This weighs down the bottom of your hair and keeps it in check, but gives hair close to your scalp volume and prevents it from looking out of place.

9. Experiment!

There are tons of products, tips, and tricks designed for curly hair out there, and many can be found on the internet or bought at reasonable prices at your local CVS or Walmart – no fancy salons necessary! It’s important that you find what works for your hair.

10. Get professional advice.

That being said, it might be a good idea to spend time in a nice salon. Make sure you find a stylist who understands what you want and is familiar with curly hair. There are many cuts that work well with curly hair, like putting in layers. It’s never a bad idea to just ask!

All in all, remember to love yourself and your hair. You were given a beautiful gift – it’s time to own it!