Fall Out Boy, If You're Reading This, I Love You
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Fall Out Boy, If You're Reading This, I Love You

I have never been a crier, especially in public. So, why did I sob like a child at my fifth Fall Out Boy concert?

Fall Out Boy, If You're Reading This, I Love You

I came to the scene late. Fall Out Boy had released their first album in the early 2000s when I was just a kid. During my teenage rebellion, I stumbled across their music and was immediately hooked. They sang about depression, love, different trials and tribulations that I was pushing through. I felt connected to them in a way I didn't even feel with my family. I could just put their music on and feel comforted by the fact that they felt the same ways I did.

My favorite album is "Folie à Deux." To this day that album is the background music of my life. One minute I'm "I Don't Care" the next minute I'm "20 Dollar Nose Bleed." The album speaks to all the moods I feel on a daily basis. I was 10 when the album came out and didn't know about it for a few years but somehow it got me.

I went to my first concert at 13. I waited for hours in a mile long line, praying that I could find some way to sneak up front and maybe even meet them. A man offered me VIP tickets in trade for mine, and as a truly stupid teenager I took him up on that offer. Somehow, it didn't wind up with me getting killed but instead got me all the way to the first row and screamed my heart out.

One of the clearest memories in my head was from that concert. I can hear everyone chanting the same line over and over, "Detox just to Retox." I remember that sweaty crowded room, and what it felt like to be surrounded by people and have no anxiety. It was because of them.

I was addicted. I had to see them every chance I could and I ended up doing just that. Year after year I would be at their concerts screaming old and new lyrics alike. Lyrics that actually meant something, lyrics that gave me the strength to fight all my demons. Everything was fall out boy, posters covered my room, I bought every CD and even a CD player for them. I would stop in the most intimidating store in the mall, Hot Topic, for new gauges and whatever Fall Out Boy merchandise they had.

Finally, in 2018, the most recent Florida concert. I bought two tickets thinking the guy I'm in love with would go with me as he said. He had other plans, he left me two weeks early and I was lost. Now, the concert was the last thing on my mind, he took all the excitement from me. When I came around to thinking about it, I realized I was going to be driving three hours away to see them, alone, with an extra ticket. I texted my best friend but she couldn't get off work, another friend had mono, everyone had something. I finally accepted that the tickets were cursed and I would be alone as per usual. My mom of all people actually agreed to go!

I somehow remember the whole concert, while still having it feel like a blur. It went by so quick as they managed to play everything I needed to hear. That's when "Sugar We're Going Down" came on and I was reminded where it all started. I realized at that moment it was going to be OK if Fall Out Boy could go from a garage band to filling out the arena's I could handle anything. That's why I cried because I'm going to be OK.

So, Fall Out Boy, if you ever read this, I love you!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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