Why I Choose To Love My Friends For Changing | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

Why I Choose To Love My Friends For Changing

We like to act like change is the answer to everything, but hate our friends for doing the same thing.

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Why I Choose To Love My Friends For Changing
Shelby Shepard

Humans live in a paradox: they love personal growth, but they hate when the people around them change. People seem to have this bizarre expectation that they should be growing and discovering new truths, yet their friends should all remain the same.

Every day, there are new uplifting quotes encouraging people to change their habits, their opinions, and their lives. Self-growth and personal discoveries are glorified on Pinterest; change is celebrated in the surge of adventurous photos people share on Facebook. People describe change as the answer to everything in life, but simultaneously, they condemn each other for changing. How is it fair that people celebrate their own life changes and judge their friends so harshly for doing the same thing? How many times have you heard someone say, "I don't know. I just feel like I don't know them anymore." This issue is this: people are using change as the answer to everything, but they are horrified when their close friends try to do the same thing. Changes, big or small, are really important. Changes can alter your journey in life; they can inspire you to grow and they can stop you from doing things that don't benefit your life. Every change plays a role in your development, and I agree that it can be a very good thing.

I have learned to love change. I have learned to see it as an opportunity instead of a potential disaster. The difference between me and many of the people around me is the fact that I also choose to celebrate the changes I see in my friends. I don't judge them or gossip about them for their self-growth. Instead, I love them for it. Of course, I miss certain things that used to be true of my family and friends, but that's what memories are for. I hold my memories dear, and I like to think about the fun times that I've had with the people close to me without judging them for the fact that those memories will remain a part of the past.

I have realized that if I expected my friends to stay the same as they were when we met, I would prevent myself from being a part of their futures. My childhood friends are different people today than they were when we were little, and I love it. They are more experienced, insightful, and opinionated now than they were as children. I can't hold them accountable for some rigid idea I have of their personalities. Besides, what right do I have to decide what type of person they are? It isn't my place to try and force them to act the way they did when we met, or to pout when they simply can't fit that mold anymore. So, I refuse to join the crowd and accuse my friends of "becoming strangers." Rather, I love them and I keep up with their changes -- just like they do for me.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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