This Is For The Girl Like Me Who Doesn't Have It All Together

This Is For The Girl Like Me Who Doesn't Have It All Together

Does life just hit you so hard sometimes that the only thing you can do is sit back and laugh?

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There have been so many moments where I think I have my life together. Those moments soon show the truth… that is that I don't have my life together. In times like those, I like to sit back and laugh at myself. I laugh at the moments that I thought I was making a good decision and I laugh at the times where I cried over something so pointless. You see, I laugh a lot. But, I also worry a lot.

The truth is that we all have our moments. Sometimes life is overwhelming and if you are like me you hold all your emotions in until you can't hold them in anymore.

Everyone likes to put on the strong face… and if you know me you know that I always have a smile on my face, but that doesn't always mean that I am okay. And that's the truth; I'm not always okay. And as crazy as this may sound, it's okay to not be okay.

It's okay to not be okay and it is okay to not have everything together. You are you, even if you don't know who that is yet. There is always time to change, there is always time to be who you want to be.

You do not have to impress anyone, you can be whoever you want to be at any time you decide to be that person. You are in control of your own life and no one has any say in the decisions you make. It's never too late. Take a deep breath, be yourself, don't lose yourself, love yourself.

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My "Thank U, Next" Story

One Taught me patience and pain at the same time, but everything led me to my love.

MeganO
MeganO
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Everyone handles a break up differently, and me and my ex from high school did not have the most subtle breakup. We had been together for almost two years, and she and I had been friends since middle school, so we already knew a good bit about each other, so when we broke up it hurt way more than it would if I hadn't known them for such a long time.

Around the beginning of my freshman year of high school, I was beginning to question my sexuality. I was really trying to figure out if I was attacked to females, males or both. I had a lot on my plate at home with my parent's divorce and I just had also managed to find myself sort of being isolated from my friends, or at least I began to feel like that.

I found myself developing feelings for the girl, and I told her and we ended up dating for about a week that January, and then, later that year in May I asked her out again and we dated a long time.

Our relationship was difficult, definitely because when I would come over I couldn't say or do anything that couples do because he was hiding the relationship from her dad and the majority of her family. She had a very Christian family and she was scared of how they would react to her being with a female, which I totally understood.

Only one person in her family who really 'knew' we were a couple was her mom, however, her dad confessed after we broke up that he knew the whole time and didn't care.

Anyways, we broke up March 23, which was a school day and In the band room before first period she told me she just 'didn't love me anymore' basically, when about a few days prior I had taken us out on a date to eat and see a movie. At the time it felt so sudden, and I was genuinely hurt by it all but I tried to be her friend.

It was just insane because she had basically proposed to me on my birthday (which looking back on it was a bit too early to be engaged) which a month before and then wanted to break up so It was a major blow to the heart there. We actually worked together at one of the McDonalds in our town and I ended up quitting because of it because it hurt to be around her.

I thought I had made my peace with it all, that is until June came around. I was at a friends house when suddenly everything made sense. Now, near the end of our relationship, she quit letting me come over and a close friend was crashing at her house for the longest.

He had told my best friend he had feelings for someone but they were in a relationship and my said friend warned me, and I shrugged it off but it had always been in the back of my head after I learned that.

I am sure you all probably know where this is going, but if you don't let just say I wasn't the only one my girlfriend was dating. It blew up pretty badly, and I handled it in the worse way possible. I actually went crazy after all my suspicions were confirmed, and broke things and screamed.

About three friends and the man who is my current boyfriend, but not at the time, all banded together to make it up to me. We went to the McDonalds we worked at and it just so happened that my ex and the guy she cheated on me for five months was there as well. Let's just say I almost got banned from McDonald's that day.

Anyways the whole ordeal let me get closer to the guy I am with today. I may have done some things I'm not proud of during the breakup ordeal and after I had found out about everything, but it set me but to be the person I am now.

I confronted her about it when our senior year started and her defense was that 'she didn't want to hurt me' by breaking up with me, but if she would have just broken up with me it wouldn't have hurt as bad as her cheating did. Everything I went through led me to the man who has made me ten times happier, and I can gladly say at my 'next' is the best.

As Ariana Grande said, "I'm so F***ing grateful for my ex."

MeganO
MeganO

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