Whenever you are sick, at first, you rejoice because being sick means you can stay at home all day and watch Netflix while eating copious amounts of soup and crackers without anyone hardcore judging you. Then, you realize being sick is actually the worst. Whether you have the common cold, or are suffering from the flu, here are the stages of sickness some of us know all too well.

Stage 1: Hooray! I'm sick!

I like to call this stage the honeymoon stage because at first you rejoice at the fact that you can lay in your bed and have no responsibilities! But then your sickness becomes more and more of an issue. First of all, you are either sneezing or blowing your nose all the time, wishing you had the luxury to breathe out of your nose again. Then, if you are at school, you have to take care of yourself. I mean, your friends may offer to bring you food or water, but it is not the same as having your mom and dad there to wait on you hand and foot.

Stage 2: Being responsible when you don’t want to be.

Sometimes we cannot afford to lay in bed all day, especially if you have already taken a few sick days off work, or missed a few days of class, and so you just do not want to talk to anyone. It is really hard to be productive when you are sick because your general brain functions are caput, and all you want to do is rest. But alas, this essay is not going to write itself.

Stage 3: Being absolutely sick you can’t move.

This is the worst phase. If you are at school, then this is the point where I am calling my mom every ten seconds asking if I have waited long enough to take more Motrin, or how much water is acceptable for one person to consume in one day. You may even be so sick that you only get out of bed to drink water, take meds, or go to the bathroom. Where is Superman to save you and your immune system?! For many people, this stage is so exhausting because you cannot sleep that well in addition to feeling just flat out horrible. Basically, you are laying in your bed staring at the ceiling with Kleenex boxes surrounding you.

Stage 4: Not sure if getting better, or getting worse.

You have been taking your medicine and drinking plenty of fluids, but you are not exactly sure if you are feeling any better, or are just are getting accustomed to feeling like poop. This stage can be deceiving because some people do feel better that they no longer believe they are sick, and stop taking the prescribed medicine. DO NOT do that. One sure fire way to stay sick is to have a prescription antibiotic for ten days, and stop taking it after eight because you think you are better. What actually happens is the remaining bacteria of the sickness is the strongest bacteria left, so if you stop taking your medicine, then this bacteria will become immune to the antibiotic and continue to make you sick. Even worse, you will have to go back to the doctor and take more medicine that hopefully will eliminate the now stronger bacteria.

Stage 5: At last, I see the light.

When your immune system finally regains some of its strength, and the medicine you’re taking starts to work, you feel a little better. Actually getting out of bed without feeling dizzy, sick, or exhausted is so new, but also refreshing. Overall, brainpower improves and you can start to become a functioning human being again. Eating regular meals does not seem as intimidating, or as impossible as it had before when you were thriving off of water, salt crackers, and soup.

Stage 6: Fully better

Being sick is NOT fun, I repeat being sick IS NOT FUN! You also probably become more of a hypochondriac and carry Kleenex, hand sanitizer, and Chap Stick with you everywhere because you never know when someone might sneeze on you in the grocery store (an actual event that happened to my mom, how rude!) But, you should be proud of yourself because you successfully took care of yourself (sort of), therefore proving you are (maybe) ready for the adult world.

Although being sick has its ups and downs, mostly downs, you will get through it! Stock up on some Kleenex, water, Motrin, soup, salt crackers, and Ginger ale or Sprite, and make sure to get plenty of rest. To avoid getting sick in the first place, wash your hands and avoid sharing drinks and food with people even if they say they are not sick. Make your new years resolution to get more sleep, drink water, eat properly, and always carry Kleenex and hand sanitizer with you.

Fun fact college kids: Mono has an incubation period of four to six weeks, meaning you could indeed have mono without knowing it because you are not feeling symptoms right away. Or, your friend could have mono without knowing it and share some water with you and BAM you probably have it too. So, basically never share drinks because how could you know if someone could have mono or not.

With that, I wish everyone a great year hopefully filled with less sickness and more fun!