Your Relationship With God Is Not About You
You're not serving God. You're serving You.
What limits are you putting on your relationship with God?
There's a difference between God coming into your life and surrendering your life to Him.
God coming into your life can be you allowing God in the car but you don't actually want Him to drive. Maybe He's just in your bio. Maybe you just hang a symbol of Him around your neck. Maybe you call on Him when you're scared or unsure or you've run out of what to do from your own decisions. Maybe you think you have a relationship with Him from the people around you or the church people around you or how you were raised, which would be by osmosis.
You can't have faith, and therefore, can't have a relationship with God by osmosis. Faith is not logic either. Faith defies logic. Faith requires you to drop your own understanding, take up what God said (no matter how crazy it may sound; His ways are not our ways), and walk.
When you surrender your life to Him, you begin to experience all that He has for you. God is everywhere and all you have to do is look for where He's working and you'll find Him. But you will not see Him in everything if you don't surrender your life, will, and your all to Him. This surrender comes from a place of knowing that your life is not your own because you believe that your life was bought at a price that you couldn't pay on your own (1 Corinthians 6:20).
When you surrender your life to Him, I kid you not, every day is an adventure. He can use you every single day. If you pray and tell Him you want to help someone today, He will make it happen. He'll start to change you more and more every day. He'll make your heart pure with different situations, circumstances, people and more. The most beautiful part to me is that you get to become more like Love because God is Love (1 John 4:7-21).
You become more like this perfect, indescribable, unconditional, unending love that you can't get from this world.
I feel 100% selfish not sharing this word any chance that I get with other people because I see God do amazing things in my life every day. Every day is an adventure for me with God and that doesn't mean He won't use situations that feel like they could break me for me to experience this adventure. I've experienced Him taking situations that make me want to quit on life and use them to show me a deeper level of His glory, beauty, power, and his sovereignty.
When you just want God to 'come to into your life' or you just want a closer relationship with Him with you at the center then you don't want to serve Him. You want to serve you. If you want God to come into your life so that you can ask for his opinion and make your own decision to boast about how wise you are, you're serving you. If you want Him in your life so you can tap into more success, money, and things then you're not serving Him. You're serving your ego and things are your master.
If you just want God to be in the car with you without actually being the driver then you're serving you.
If you just want to hear God's opinion but you're ultimately going to make your own decision then you're serving you.
If you ignore the convictions and warning signs of God tapping on your spirit to guide you in His will for you then you're serving you.
We have a selfish nature and if we don't surrender to God then we'll serve our flesh. Our flesh will make us start wanting and serving things that will take us out. Our flesh will make us serve our insecurities by building up pride and selfishness. Our flesh will make us serve laziness and our feelings which makes us complacent.
God cannot penetrate your heart and change your nature to be more like the 'Christians you look up to' until you surrender. This is about Him. This is about you following after Him and what He says is His will for the life He gave you.
*p.s. To be obedient is to do what He said even in the presence of another choice