Quote Unquote

I love quotes as much as the next girl; many times I've shared them with my friends or hung them in my room, but some people are just crossing lines these days. My hope is to someday either 1) Be famous/notable enough that my words become quotes, or 2) Continue to say such ridiculous things that people quote me anyway, though I remain mediocre. The second option seems preferable because I rarely have to dress up for anything.

"Forget all the reasons why it won't work and believe the one reason why it will."

Situations in which this would go horribly wrong: crossing the street with a blindfold on, building a house out of spaghetti noodles, smoking cigarettes while your friends are having a gasoline fight.

"People don't change, they reveal who they really are."

Fiona, are you seeing this? I'm here if you need me (Shrek reference and if you don't get it, you don't deserve to).

"There is no angry way to say bubbles."

"If you want to know where your heart is, look to where your mind goes when it wanders."

My heart is in the third "Land Before Time" movie. That's accurate.

"Walk like you have three men walking behind you."

I am not exaggerating when I say that the last time I did that, I fell down concrete stairs and had to get 11 stitches in my knee. Exactly three men.

"You can sleep when you're dead."

I hate this quote with every fiber of my being. Sleep is essential to human function. Also, when you're dead, you won't be able to feel/know anything anyway so this quote is just awful.

"If you are persistent, you will get it. If you are consistent, you will keep it."

Stalkers everywhere, rejoice!

"When you feel like quitting, think about why you started."

Perfect for an anti-smoking ad.

"Become a morning person."

AKA how to make everyone hate you.

"The only limits in life are the ones you make."

THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST, IDIOTS.

"Cinderella is proof that a pair of shoes can change your life."

What about Puss in Boots? I'm sure he'll never be the same either… and I have now referenced Shrek twice.

"Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as being stuck somewhere you don't belong."

Too true, James Franco.

"If a girl is silent, she's either 1. Over thinking 2. Tired of waiting 3. About to blow up 4. Needs a hug 5. Falling apart 6. Crying inside 7. All of the above"

Okay, well 2 to 3 went 0 to 100, real quick. She's either tired of waiting or about to BLOW UP. If she's all of the above, the trauma of blowing up will definitely necessitate a hug. Also, has nobody considered the option that she's mute?

"Romeo and Juliet is just another reason why communication in a relationship is so crucial."

That's definitely the only lesson I got from that story, for sure.

"She said 'I'm afraid of falling' and he said, 'I have wings.'"

?????????????? Pegasus? Kevin from the movie Up?

"The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday."

Yeah for real. That chick SUCKS, am I right? Thank god she's gone.

"You can have anything you want if you give up the belief that you can't have it."

Aside from all of these atrocities, there is really only one quote worth living by: "Sometimes me wonder, 'What is friend?' and then me say, 'Friend is person to share the last cookie with.' " -Cookie Monster