Start writing a post


A rape victim's response to the release of Brock Turner: The Stanford Rapist


Proof. DNA. Fingerprints. Witnesses.

This is the kind of proof needed to make what happened to me real. This is what people want. This is what I do not have.

The proof is in my scars. Every white, tan, violet, pink line on my body is a piece of evidence. Proof.

What else do you need?

Hook me up to a brain scan. See the terror, the shame, the anger that flares in my brain every time I see his face or hear his name. Proof.

Or maybe put me in a sleep study. Watch me wake up, trembling, tears streaming down my cheeks. See me reduced to the scared 8-year-old little girl I used to be, curled up in the fetal position, desperately attempting to feel something I haven’t felt since I was four years old, safety. Is that enough proof for you?

Or do you need more? Here, gather some witness statements.

Call my therapist, who told my parents I had the most deeply rooted eating disorder she’d ever treated. There. More proof.

Or maybe you should talk to the ER doctor, who said I missed my main artery by a hair while he sewed 37 stitches into my arm. How’s that for proof?

More? Here’s the number of the nurse who threw up when she saw the deep wounds running up and down my arm, the blood draining from my body. Yes. That was enough proof for her.

Maybe you should call the staff at the psych ward that had to pry the makeshift blade out of my hands that I was clinging onto for dear life.

Because that was my life.

For years my life revolved around numbing the pain that my rapist caused me. The pain that isn’t real because some judge didn’t sign off on it.

Because there wasn’t enough proof.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments