As students, leaders, and professionals, we hold ourselves in high regard and aim for others to as well. It's no secret that most people with high goals for themselves are "type A" or controlling in nature. With this stringent set of work ethics, the perfectionist gene can get out of control. Anxiety, insomnia, feelings of helplessness and more can come out of environments led by those who want the best at all costs.
For these reasons, it's important to practice self-forgiveness. We're not perfect. We're smart enough to know that change takes time, yet we want results immediately.
- Patience doesn't come easy for some, yet it's something we must adopt. Setting realistic expectations helps and if you've ever tried SMART planning, you're on your way.
- Trusting others takes mental and emotional strength. Delegating is power and when you learn to give other tasks that suit their talents, you're giving them leeway to perform. Of course, you want to set them up for success, and we have methods to do that.
- Owning your mistakes is empowering. It's easy to point the finger of blame at others. Effective leaders look inward first to see where their lack of insight or follow through may have caused a loss.
Making peace with ourselves after leadership mistakes and mis-steps is not a self-absorbed activity. We typically live with more courage when we hold the faith that we will devotionally move toward self-forgiveness. A risk that might have unfavorable consequences is no longer paralyzing, as we can anticipate moving toward self-forgiveness. It is a freedom that can yield more depth and meaning in our relationships. When we are not defending a self-concept pummeled by guilt and self-incrimination, we become more generous with offering compassion to others. Forgiveness possesses a heart-opening quality that tempers resentment and vindictiveness, allowing us to be more receptive to seeking reconciliation with others. As we strive less for perfection, we discover a growing acceptance for the limits and shortcomings of others. There is an abiding honoring of the human condition reflected by our own lives and the lives of others.
