Dear Incoming College Freshman,
You're probably super stoked to meet cool people and have a fun time and do awesome things and just have the best years of your life, right?
Awesome, cool, great, yeah do that. But keep in mind that people suck.
Having 18 years of experience interacting with other homo sapiens, there is one thing I can tell you about our species. People suck.
This article has not been written out of cynicism, but out of truth.
It doesn't matter what your first impression is of people, just keep in mind that it's generally wrong. You and the rest of your high school classmates have been taught that college is a great time to start fresh and reinvent yourself. This is true, but many of you are incapable of doing so.
No one believes this, but will eventually find it to be true. So many of the people I met in my first year at college were trying to transform themselves from what they had been previously. A lot of them did not succeed. They were trying to be different people than they had been for the past 18 or 19 years of their lives.
While I'm not exactly a psychology major (I'm biochemistry, I know nothing about psych stuff), I do know the conversion from high school to college can be stressful. Keeping this in mind, also add on the fact that some people are trying to change everything about themselves. Sounds like a rough time.
I went into college orientation not trying to make any drastic changes to whom I already was and was unaware of the many people trying to make this huge change, so it was startling to watch everyone struggle with who they were.
The first friends I made in my orientation group were my first tip-off that everyone wasn't so awesome or whatever. I met a girl named Emmaline who was trying to be someone whom she was not. She told everyone her nickname was Lynn, but whenever someone tried to yell to her during a kickball game using her nickname, she didn't register that they were talking to her. She did, however, register and respond to "Emmaline." I've seen her a few times since orientation, but I barely recognize her.
Those who do not manage to have a bettering college experience their freshman year are those you should watch out for. They may present as normal or mundane to you, but don't be so keen to become BFFs with everyone you meet. If someone is unhappy with who they are or their lives in general, they may not be so nice to you. People you hang out with and seem fine for the first two months or so may change.
In doing so, their behavior toward you may change and become unsettling. Don't ignore anything weird, it may actually turn into something dangerous. People suck, and they're going to hurt you, whether it be intentionally or unintentionally.
That being said, don't shy away from people entirely and hole up in your dorm room. There's plenty of great people to hang out or get Tim Horton's with at 3 a.m. with. Finding those people is worth dealing with all of the other jerks out there. I was lucky enough to end my freshman year of college with a ton of good friends I know I can count on no matter what, and I am now able to keep in mind that people suck.
Those who cannot reinvent themselves or revert back to their ways before college may change drastically within days. It's unsettling to watch. Don't believe everything anyone says. Just take it at face value.
If you take anything away from this article, hopefully it is the knowledge that people suck. Your freshman-year roommate might be a sketch ball (don't be scared about rooming with someone you don't know; I didn't know my freshman roommate prior to move-in day, and she's become a real pal), that boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever that you started dating a week after you met them might actually not be your soulmate (shocker, I know), and that good "friend" you have may not be a friend at all.
