In a world where everyone wants to be unique, it can be difficult to be different when everyone wants to be the same kind of different. For example, the classic "hipster" strives to be unique, however, all hipsters look the same. To change this, I decided to do something so strange that simply no one else would even want to do it. I decided to replace my fingers with Cheetos. I know what you're thinking, "Why not Cheezy Poofs?". That's because Chester Cheetah is a super rad dude and South Park is not real life. Here is a recount of my life changing journey so far.
Orange dust is everywhere.
As expected, everything I touch with my crunchy fingers turns a beautiful shade of sunset orange. I am not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing.
My fingers are a snack
Cheeto lovers are always trying to take a munch out of my fingers at the worst times. I'll be about to pet a dog, but the dogs try to eat me. I can't touch my boyfriend's face without him trying to sneak a little bite out of me. This is proving to be quite an inconvenience. I'm lucky I don't like Cheetos.
Everything is difficult
Driving, typing, heck, I had to hire a darn secretary to type this article for me because I don't want to break my delicate Cheeto fingers. But hey, at least I'm unique.