Limitations

Recently, I finished my second to last semester at Huntington University. I grew a lot over the past year, and I even participated in student leadership for the first time. For those that don't know, HU has two positions of leadership on every dormitory floor: RA (Resident Assistant) and CMC (Campus Ministry Coordinator). Most colleges have an RA, but HU adds the CMC role to help spiritual growth on each floor. It is a Christian college after all.

Over the previous two semesters, I was a CMC. I was in charge of helping the floor grow together in a God-glorifying way. It kinda sucked. Now, don't jump to conclusions. I believe full-heartedly in the CMC program at Huntington. Everyone involved in it is really caring and wants to see God glorified. I love them so much. Sadly, I am not a natural leader. I shy away from leadership at every opportunity, but I still took this position anyway. There was a lot I had to learn in a short amount of time, and I never truly hit a sense of flow with the whole thing. Still, I did what I could.

When the first semester ended, a CMC survey was given out to my floor to evaluate how I was doing. For the most part, the results came back positive. Most people seemed to think I was doing a good job. There was one comment, though, that stopped me in my tracks. The person commented that I shouldn't be a CMC since I deal with "social anxiety."

First things first, I don't actually have social anxiety. I am very shy around people I don't know, and I am an introvert by nature. That doesn't mean I have social anxiety. Second, I think the comment was more aimed at the fact I struggle with depression.

As I've alluded to several times in this blog, I have a long-standing battle with depression that has made life a living hell at times. Despite this, I've kept going, pushing through so that I could help others who struggle. I was very forthright with this fact to my floor. I never hid what my struggle was from anyone. Because of that, I was apparently not fit for the CMC position according to this person.

That's some bull, my friends. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't succeed because you struggle with depression. I finished out the year as CMC and made several memories that could last me a lifetime. I fought every day to be better than my depression threatened to make me. These struggles do not have to stop you, and don't listen to anyone that tells you differently.

I assume the comment was made with good intentions. I highly doubt anyone would have singled me out and tried to get me kicked out of the CMC program. Regardless, it hurt. I never chose to struggle with depression. It's still there, though, and I can't change that because someone thinks it makes me unfit for a job. Instead, I push through, and I hope you can too.

Even if you don't deal with depression, I would still encourage you to push through whatever struggle presents itself. There are thousands of ways that people can use to put you down. Use those to fight harder. Give all that you have and leave it at that. Additionally, I would ask that if you have made a comment like that anonymous writer, please examine why you did it. Depression is not a good reason to fire or refuse to hire someone. Instead, it's a reason for you to help someone who deals with it however you can.