When Compatibility Is Found, True Love Is Made
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Dating

When compatibility is found, True love is made

True love is consistent because we consistently give it, regardless of our current emotion.

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There's a tendency in American society, today, to only pursue love's emotion without considering the cost of doing so. This pursuit is derived from the fact that we are surrounded by the mysticism of finding "the one." We delude ourselves into believing there's an inherent checklist of sorts, that of which one person is suitable to live up to; thus finding our soul-mate. Although this seems worthwhile, it is a faulty and inadequate method of determining compatibility. In formulating a collection of attributes or characteristics, we begin to actively seek out why someone is flawed and doesn't measure up to those standards. Secondarily, if the relationship ends, this belief leaves room for us to feel completely despondent and as if we have no hope for relational happiness in the future since they were "the one." We then become blinded and bludgeoned by what once gave us so much life and clarity. As Shakespeare said, "and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind."

I heard a phrase some time ago which exemplifies this point: "finding love is to find our soul's counterpart in another." Although I believe there's truth to that statement, the idea it presents can be particularly dangerous to hold as authoritative and representative of the true nature of love. To believe that we will inevitably find our counterpart, in that, there's someone 'out there' who's meant for me, seems to detract from the most fundamental aspect of love: the verb or action which gives worth and meaning to the expression. To express the love you claim to have, in a way that is relative to how you feel, will ultimately make a mockery of the one of whom you are pledging yourself to. You're not actually loving them, you're loving the feeling.

To long for and strive after such a person, after a love as unfounded as this, is the equivalence of chasing after the wind. A fallacy that is based on little more than romantic poetry and linguistic eloquence. Like an addict, we seek out the next high when the feelings fade because this is what we personify love to be: a feeling. Yet when the inevitable day comes that our emotions fade, whether in our twilight years or simply when that burning infatuation dwindles, it is then that the truth comes to bare. Either our love was true, having been rooted in thought and action, or it was little more than a fleeting feeling.

To outline it plainly: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Without the emotion, love is a drudgery but without the will it is a mockery. If your will is not committed to the one you have pledged to love, you're making a mockery of that person. Therefore, when you come and make that commitment make sure your will comes with you, otherwise, your goodness will be like the morning cloud and like the dew, it will go away.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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