5 Late Night Comedy Hosts And How Well They Can Probably Grill A Steak

5 Late Night Comedy Hosts And How Well They Can Probably Grill A Steak

Late night hosting and steak grilling are directly correlated.

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Late night comedy is the perfect escape. It's the perfect way to unwind before bedtime, catch up on the news of the day with a satirical twist, and see what new or exciting comedy segment your favorite host has come up with recently. From Fallon to Colbert, each show offers something different and delivers its own unique perspective, reflected through the content of the show and the host as well. However, whenever I watch late night comedy, one question always seems to pop up in my mind. I always find myself wondering how well each host would be able to grill a steak. You can tell a surprising amount about the way a person grills a steak by the way that person hosts a late night comedy show, so here are five late night hosts, ranked by how well they can probably grill a steak.

1. John Oliver

"Last Week Tonight" with John Oliver is a television masterpiece that offers a blend of late night comedy and informative journalism, achieving wondrous results. It may not be a traditional late night show, but John Oliver's talents create something truly unique and as a result, it seems like this guy really knows how to grill a steak. If you're at a barbecue and John Oliver happens to be there, there is a pretty good chance that he will take over for the grill master and show everybody how it's done, because he just knows how to grill.

2. Stephen Colbert

Colbert's spectacular charisma and naturally funny persona make him a prime late night comedy host, as well as a prime steak griller. Colbert's show is a fair amount more political than your average late night show, but even though it seems to lean rather heavily on political humor, the show is still wildly funny and entertaining, which is how you know that Colbert also knows a thing or two about grilling up some steaks. And honestly, I get the vibe that Colbert can not only grill a steak, but he can handle chicken and burgers as well.

3. Jimmy Fallon

Fallon's goofy, yet hilarious presence, his immense talent, and his willingness to pretty much be friends with everyone have allowed him to secure what is probably the most sought-after position in late night TV, the host of the Tonight Show. His show is a bit more light-hearted than Oliver or Colbert, and as a result Fallon may apply this light-hearted nature to his steak-grilling as well, although it seems hard to tell. He is a phenomenal late night host, and definitely knows how to grill a steak, his technique may just differ a little bit from some of the other hosts.

4. Jimmy Kimmel

As a U of A student, I should probably automatically despise Jimmy Kimmel since he went to ASU. However, his show does have some pretty funny segments. I do wonder, however, about his steak-grilling abilities sometimes. I'm sure that Jimmy Kimmel knows his way around a grill, but grilling just doesn't strike me as a typical activity for him. But hey, I could be wrong.

5. Seth Meyers

Seth Meyers' show doesn't always work for me, and he was probably in a position that was a better fit when he was head writer and host of Weekend Update for "Saturday Night LIve." Still, the show does have its entertaining moments, and Seth is still a relatively new late night host, so he still has time to improve. For some reason, Seth strikes me as the master of grilling steaks, like he is unbelievably good at it and watching him grill is like watching a true master at work.

Okay, so I've never actually asked any of these late night hosts about their steak-grilling abilities, nor have I ever seen any of them grill a steak. But, I have watched their shows, which has really given me all the insight I need into these five late night comedy hosts, and the way they grill their steaks.

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35 Major Life Facts According To Nick Miller

"All booze is good booze, unless it's weak booze."
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Fact: If you watch "New Girl," you love Nick Miller.

You can't help it. He's an adorable, lovable mess of a man and you look forward to seeing him and his shenanigans each week. While living the infamous and incomparable life of Nick Miller, and obviously Julius Pepperwood— he has learned many valuable laws of the land. And, although Nick refuses to learn anything from anyone besides his mysterious, old Asian friend Tran, he does have a few lessons he'd like to teach us.

Here are 35 facts of life according to 'Nick Milla Nick Milla':

1. Drinking keeps you healthy.

"I'm not gonna get sick. No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer."

2. Dinosaurs never existed.

"I don't believe dinosaurs existed. I've seen the science. I don't believe it."


3. A paper bag is a bank.

"A bank is just a paper bag but with fancier walls."


4. Having sex is similar to delivering mail.

"I'm like a mailman, except instead of mail it's hot sex that I deliver."

5. Moonwalking is a foolproof way to get out of any awkward situation.

Jess (about Nick): "Now he won't even talk to me. I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me. He does that sometimes."

6. Using a movie reference is also a great way.

Cece: "Come on, get up!"

Nick: "No, I don't dance. I'm from that town in "Footloose."

7. There's no reason to wash towels.

Nick: "I don’t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towel?"

Schmidt: "You never wash your towel?"

Nick: "What am I gonna do? Wash the shower next? Wash a bar of soap?"

8. Exes are meant to be avoided at all costs (especially if/unless they're Caroline)

"I don't deal with exes, they're part of the past. You burn them swiftly and you give their ashes to Poseidon."

9. IKEA furniture is not as intimidating as it looks.

"I'm building you the dresser. I love this stuff. It's like high-stakes LEGOs."

10. You don't need forks if you have hands.

Jess: "That's gross. Get a fork, man."

Nick: "I got two perfectly good forks at the end of my arms!"

11. Sex has a very specific definition.


"It's not sex until you put the straw in the coconut."

12. Doors are frustrating.

"I will push if I want to push! Come on! I hate doors!"

13. All booze is good booze.

"Can I get an alcohol?"

14. ...unless it's weak booze.

"Schmidt, that is melon flavored liquor! That is 4-proof! That is safe to drink while you're pregnant!"

15. Writers are like pregnant women.

Jess: "You know what that sound is? It's the sound of an empty uterus."

Nick: "I can top that easily. I'm having a hard time with my zombie novel."

Jess: "Are you really comparing a zombie novel to my ability to create life?"

Nick: "I'm a writer, Jess. We create life."

16. All bets must be honored.

"There is something serious I have to tell you about the future. The name of my first-born child needs to be Reginald VelJohnson. I lost a bet to Schmidt."

17. Adele's voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

"Adele is amazing."

18. Beyoncé is extremely trustworthy.

"I'd trust Beyoncé with my life. We be all night."

19. Fish, on the other hand, are not.


“Absolutely not. You know I don’t trust fish! They breathe water. That's crazy!"

20. Bar mitzvahs are terrifying.

Schmidt: "It's a bar mitzvah!"

Nick: "I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised!"

21. ...so are blueberries.

Jess: "So far, Nick Miller's list of fears is sharks, tap water, real relationships..."

Nick: "And blueberries."

22. Take your time with difficult decisions. Don't be rash.


Jess: "You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick?"

Nick: "You're putting me in a tough spot!"

23. Getting into shape is not easy.

"I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less donuts."

24. We aren't meant to talk about our feelings.

"If we needed to talk about feelings, they would be called talkings."


25. We're all a little bit too hard on ourselves.

"The enemy is the inner me."

26. Freezing your underwear is a good way to cool off.


"Trust me, I'm wearing frozen underpants right now and I feel amazing. I'm gonna grab some old underpants and put a pair into the freezer for each of you."

27. Public nudity is normal.

"Everbody has been flashed countless times."

28. Alcohol is a cure-all.


"You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol."

29. Horses are aliens.

"I believe horses are from outer-space."


30. Turtles should actually be called 'shell-beavers.'

Jess: "He calls turtles 'shell-beavers."

Nick: "Well, that's what they should be called."

31. Trench coats are hot.


"This coat has clean lines and pockets that don't quit, and it has room for your hips. And, when I wear it, I feel hot to trot!"


32. Sparkles are too.

"Now, my final bit of advice, and don't get sensitive on this, but you've got to change that top it's terrible and you've got to throw sparkles on. Sparkles are in. SPARKLES ARE IN."

33. Introspection can lead to a deeper knowing of oneself.

"I'm not convinced I know how to read. I've just memorized a lot of words."


34. It's important to live in the moment.

"I know this isn't gonna end well but the middle part is gonna be awesome."


35. Drinking makes you cooler.

Jess: "Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing."

Nick: "That's the only thing in the world I know to be true."

Cover Image Credit: Hollywood Reporter

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