7 Reasons I'd Be A B***h To You Without Apologizing
Start writing a post
Student Life

7 Reasons I'd Be A B***h To You Without Apologizing

I'm not funny -- I'm just mean and people think I'm joking

14
7 Reasons I'd Be A B***h To You Without Apologizing
Giphy

The truth is, when I told you to “shut up” last week because your story had already taken up five minutes of my life that I will never get back, I wasn’t trying to be funny. I, seriously, with every fiber of my being just wanted you to stop talking.


People often wonder why I’m so mean. Well, to be accurate, the question I get is, “Why are you such a b***h?” Personally, I prefer to be called that than mean. Being mean is just so pedestrian, while being a b***h is about being honest and confident. So I figured I would do some personal reflection and explain everything, once and for all.

1. It will always bother me that you don’t know the difference between there, their, and they’re.

Almost as much as it will bother me that you don’t know the difference between your and you’re. Figure it out or expect a comment. On that note, your phone has autocorrect so there is zero excuse for misspelled words over text.

2. If the question is dumb, don’t ask it.

My immediate, “Are you stupid?” response was not meant to make the people sitting around me laugh -- it was a genuine question. If you don’t know if the question is dumb, then it probably is.

3. Understand politics.

Especially in a presidential election year, please have a basic understanding of the political process. And if you have a political opinion, please be prepared to back it up with more than just a news station sound bite. If you don’t, I will call you out on it (see “are you stupid” reference above).

4. Your annoying chewing habits.

Is it really so difficult for you to chew with your mouth closed? No one, and when I say no one I’m not exaggerating, wants to hear the smacking of your food between your teeth. I promise to be the first to tell you leave the room if you cannot control yourself and I will be as impolite as your chewing. Let's leave the vile chewing to the cows, please.

5. When I have my headphones in, I am not open for conversation.

You 100 percent do not have permission to talk to me. It is even more annoying after you realize that I am perfectly content listening to whatever I’m listening to, you motion for me to take them out so I can hear you? I’m letting you know right now, that will never happen.

6. Personal space is extremely important.

If I can tell you what you had for lunch that day, you are definitely too close. Our arms do not need to touch while we are walking. If we are walking in a group, please concentrate on the walking aspect of the group activity, because it seems to be such a challenge for you. If I step on the back of your shoe, or you on mine, we are definitely too close. Keep that in mind when you’re torturing your next victim.

7. Imitation is flattery, but copying is just tacky.

While it's flattering that you want to be me, please make sure to at least wait an acceptable period of time before you run out and buy what I wore yesterday. I am well aware my hair looks good, but that does not give you permission to make the next appointment at my hair salon. Please don't.

Now, I never needed reassurance in the fact that I am a b***h and with good reason, but I’m hoping that this article has given you all of the justification you need. Stop being annoying, and maybe (but probably not) I’ll stop being a b***h!

(These are in no particular order and they all irritate me equally.)

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

76091
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

141978
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments