If depression was a person, she’d be the one always lurking around the corner. Not always taking the center stage but always finding a space out in the audience. Piling cement blocks on my chest one by one, she’d make it her purpose to make everything seem heavy while simultaneously making nothing matter at all. She’d be the one who cuts a cold, hard, stare at me in the mirror at night. She tells me I will never find love and that I’d never find the true meaning of happiness.

Yet, depression is not a person.

You are not your depression. You are you - a strong, beautiful, and kind soul.

So when my depression wants to act as a part of my identity, I simply remind her of the things that make the world light up when all seems dark:

• The feeling of my hands around a warm mug and the first sip of coffee at the brink of a chilly winter morning.
• The orange and pink glow that illuminates the sky every morning outside of my window.
• Getting a new record and discovering the art inside of the cover.
• The pride of acing an exam that you studied so hard for and worried endlessly about.
• The laughter you get with your best friend when your stomach hurts and tears trickle down your cheek.
• Hearing a specific song on the radio and remembering a happy memory only you know about.
• Drinking wine and dancing in the kitchen with your best friends.
• The feeling of holding hands with someone for the first time.
• Approaching the New York City skyline at night.
• Finding old photographs from your childhood.
• Walking down the boardwalk at night time and not getting hit by the train car (South Jersey insider).
• Watching your favorite movies, reciting them line for line, and still finding them as sensational as the first time you watched them.
• The feeling of excitement and joy when you see your food approaching your table.
• Going to dog parks and owners letting you pet their adorable pups.
• The rush of swiping your metro card and just making the subway, as the saxophone player orchestrates your triumph.
• Laying underneath a pile of freshly washed, warm laundry.
• Getting warm chocolate chip pancakes at the diner after a night out.
• Sleeping in the car on the drive back from the beach, sand in your hair.
• Hearing and telling stories of passed loved ones.
• Blasting Christmas songs… in July… down the highway.
• Playing house in Ikea or any other furniture store.
• Seeing the most important people in your life being successful and happy.
• Your dog’s excitement after coming back home from a long trip.
• The pure vibrance of sunflowers.
• Book stores, museums, outdoor concerts.
• Long car rides with great playlists and sing alongs.
• Pure conversations about life with complete and total strangers.

I could go on and on with this list. There are so many small moments in life that will overshadow the bad days. I will vouch that everyone’s idea of happiness is different, but at the end of the day we all have people in our lives who love and care about us. When the person depression acts as takes over, just remember all of these beautiful moments that are uniquely suited to your life.