How To Survive Fake Patty's As Told By The Kardashians
Start writing a post
Student Life

How To Survive Fake Patty's As Told By The Kardashians

Because if anyone knows how to survive a day-long party, it's the Kardashians.

39
How To Survive Fake Patty's As Told By The Kardashians
Luke Williams Gossip

The green is flying off the shelves and everyone is rustling in their desk chairs, their countdowns now precisely at a week. Fake Patty's Day is coming to Manhattan, Kansas, and everyone is like,

Fake Patty's is one of the biggest party days in the small town of Manhattan. People from all over come to this tiny, humble town just to bar crawl from sunrise to sunset. Some of these people are returning fakers, others are virgins who will be experiencing their first Fake Patty's Day this year. Whether you're returning or this is your first one, here is a guide on how to survive the most wonderful time of the year.

1. Waking up

Right as you open your eyes, more than likely, your friends will be hovering over you, screaming "Let's get fake up!" The best tip is to not argue, and do what they say.

2. Getting ready

As you're getting ready, the holiday cheer is going to be setting in. Make sure you are not drinking too much, because you still have to get ready. If you got too faked in the morning, you'll end up looking in the mirror and being horrified.

3. Going out

When it comes to actually getting out and about on Fake Patty's Day, you'll have to have a game plan. Are you going to frats? House parties? Are you old enough to do the crawl through Aggieville? Whatever you do, make sure you have at least one other person you stick with through the whole night. Why? Because the buddy system could keep bad things from happening. Go dance on that table, flirt with whoever, have a great fake time, but safety is the most important thing.

4. Munchies

When someone says something about how good tacos sound and you can't help but to scream

This is when Aggieville becomes your go-to place. You have it all. Jimmy John's, Fuzzy's, The Varsity Truck, and much more! On Fake Patty's Day, restaurants usually have specials, and they are open from sunrise to way past sunset.

5. Handling drunk people

Sometime during this night, you're going to have to deal with someone who has simply had too much. This will test your inner parenting skills and also test your patience. The best thing to do is to take a deep breath, grab some water and bread, and make sure you have your patience on and ready to go.

6. Time management

There will be a time you look at your phone and it's 12... in the afternoon.

Fake Patty's is an all-day party, so managing your time is important. If you don't manage your time, then you're going to end up having to take a nap at 10 in the morning. Don't try to squeeze every party into your day, or else you'll end up being exhausted. Just go with the flow of the day, trust me.

7. Having The Time of Your Life

After all, college is a time to be young and make memories. This is the time for us all to go to parties, kiss a lot, and make super fun mistakes. Make sure to have the time of your life now, especially on March 5. After all, Khloe said it best.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

57779
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

37236
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

958937
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

191963
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments