Recommended for you

Start writing a post

Entertainment

How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"

Please don't google "MILF."

Corbett De Giacomo

Jul 06, 2016

Southern Methodist University

552

How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"

vevo.com

Fergie's new song; "M.I.L.F.$" is great for two reasons:

1. It has a dollar sign in the name.

2. It has a killer music video.

No, seriously, this is the music video to end all music videos. Move over, "You Belong With Me" because this one really takes the cake. Let me paint you a picture. The "M.I.L.F.$" video is basically a "Got Milk?" ad featuring a whole squad of other celeb moms. It also includes some nude bodysuits and some casual breastfeeding. Not picturing it yet? I guess I'll just have to show you some of the highlights. Basically, Fergie sing-raps while showing us that she's not a regular mom, she's a cool mom, obviously making this your how-to guide on being a great parent. I've broken it down into a few simple steps:

1. Pimp your ride.

When I was younger, this is the car my mom drove me to school in everyday:

And let me tell you, that thing never made it anywhere near a mountain.

Fergie's mom car looks like my mom's car if it got a "Princess Diaries" style makeover. Make sure your license plate says "MILFville" for an added touch of class. Also, do not google "MILFville" to see if it is a real place unless you want to be permanently scarred. You're welcome.

2. Pimp your hair and makeup.

True, your almond shape nails may be so sharp you'll have to wear oven mitts every time you want to make contact with another human, but they're nothing compared to the intense contouring you'll see in the carpool line from celeb moms like Kim K.

3. Know about nutrition.

There is a point in the video where Fergie is apparently instructing a class on nutrition, well, less nutrition and more a list of different kinds of milks plus the word "calories." That's really all you need to know, right?

4. Wear plastic.

Forget comfy clothes, according to Fergie, the best option for hot moms is some sort of shiny latex suit or nude leotard. The PTA will love it!

5. Have other hot mom friends.

Backing you up in similar latex getups, that is. Make sure to sprinkle in a few Victoria's Secret models and your squad will be complete.

Totally easy, right? Fergie is back and better than ever, check out the full video below to watch her in action.

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Lifestyle

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

North Carolina State University

1053

Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

Keep Reading...Show less

beer

Lifestyle

New England Summers Are The BEST Summers

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Saint Joseph's University

6114

www.flickr.com

Three years ago, I chose to attend college in Philadelphia, approximately 360 miles away from my small town in New Hampshire. I have learned many valuable lessons away from home, and have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent in Pennsylvania. One thing that my experience has taught me, however, is that it is absolutely impossible to beat a New England summer.

You cannot beat the beach. Believe it or not (which many people may not), New England has a long and beautiful coastline. Most of my high school summers were spent sitting on the Wall at Hampton Beach, getting sunburnt and eating Acai bowls from The Secret Spot. The Wall was the place to be both during the day and at night. We begin our days there with a KB's bagel and coffee, and end them with pizza and ice cream. It’s not a New England summer without that 4 p.m. text from someone, “Who wants to meet at the Wall tonight?” Nighttime is for Tripoli’s Pizza, the sound of waves, and wishes on shooting stars. Wednesday nights are especially important, as those are the nights that Hampton Beach sets off the weekly firework display.

Keep Reading...Show less

Recommended for you

How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"

Please don't google "MILF."

1. Pimp your ride.

2. Pimp your hair and makeup.

3. Know about nutrition.

4. Wear plastic.

5. Have other hot mom friends.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

Coors Light Summer Brew:

Leinenkugel Summer Shandy

Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat

Sam Adams Summer Ale

Hell or High Watermelon

Blue Moon Summer Honey

LandShark Lager

Corona

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

12. "Cheers to the freakin weekend.”

13. “Love’s a game. Wanna play?”

14. “You don’t know about me, but I bet you want to.”

15. “Let’s set each other’s lonely nights, Be each other’s paradise.”

16. “Trippin’ on skies, sippin’ waterfalls."

17. “Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days.”

18. “But you will remember me for centuries.”

19. “Something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman."

20. “Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me.”

21. “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

22. “Find me where the wild things are.”

23. “I’m high on lovin’ you.”

24. “If you’re gonna be somebody’s heartbreak, somebody’s mistake, if you’re gonna be somebody’s first time, somebody’s last time, be mine.”

25. “Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled on.”

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

1. "Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real Spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)

2. "It's a town full of losers/ I'm pulling out of here to win" (Thunder Road)

3. "You've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" (Tunnel of Love)

4. "I got something in my heart/ I been waitin' to give/ I got a life I wanna start/ One I been waitin' to live" (Leah)

5. “God have mercy on the man/ Who doubts what he’s sure of” (Brilliant Disguise)

7. “Is a dream a lie when it don’t come true, or is it something worse?” (The River)

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Want to know more about summer destinations?

Trending Topics

Top Creators

Trending Stories

Best of Entertainment

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments

Subscribe to our
Newsletter

1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)