How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"
Start writing a post
Entertainment

How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"

Please don't google "MILF."

532
How To Be A Hot Mom According To Fergie's "M.I.L.F.$"
vevo.com

Fergie's new song; "M.I.L.F.$" is great for two reasons:

1. It has a dollar sign in the name.

2. It has a killer music video.

No, seriously, this is the music video to end all music videos. Move over, "You Belong With Me" because this one really takes the cake. Let me paint you a picture. The "M.I.L.F.$" video is basically a "Got Milk?" ad featuring a whole squad of other celeb moms. It also includes some nude bodysuits and some casual breastfeeding. Not picturing it yet? I guess I'll just have to show you some of the highlights. Basically, Fergie sing-raps while showing us that she's not a regular mom, she's a cool mom, obviously making this your how-to guide on being a great parent. I've broken it down into a few simple steps:

1. Pimp your ride.

When I was younger, this is the car my mom drove me to school in everyday:

And let me tell you, that thing never made it anywhere near a mountain.

Fergie's mom car looks like my mom's car if it got a "Princess Diaries" style makeover. Make sure your license plate says "MILFville" for an added touch of class. Also, do not google "MILFville" to see if it is a real place unless you want to be permanently scarred. You're welcome.

2. Pimp your hair and makeup.

True, your almond shape nails may be so sharp you'll have to wear oven mitts every time you want to make contact with another human, but they're nothing compared to the intense contouring you'll see in the carpool line from celeb moms like Kim K.

3. Know about nutrition.

There is a point in the video where Fergie is apparently instructing a class on nutrition, well, less nutrition and more a list of different kinds of milks plus the word "calories." That's really all you need to know, right?

4. Wear plastic.

Forget comfy clothes, according to Fergie, the best option for hot moms is some sort of shiny latex suit or nude leotard. The PTA will love it!

5. Have other hot mom friends.

Backing you up in similar latex getups, that is. Make sure to sprinkle in a few Victoria's Secret models and your squad will be complete.

Totally easy, right? Fergie is back and better than ever, check out the full video below to watch her in action.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

51584
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

33113
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

956089
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

181020
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments