Remember when you were a child and you would only study the things you didn’t know (completely ignoring what you thought was easy)? Or you would practice that athletic move or concept that was your greatest challenge. You’d put all your focus on one area and the rest would, unintentionally, fall behind or weaken. Those times are what forgiveness is like for me. I focus on other aspects of my life such as trying to be kind and show love to others and be honest and true to myself. What took me awhile to realize was that I would never be fully successful in any of those other aspects if I didn't truly forgive.
It’s very easy to just say, “It’s okay,” and then move on as if everything really is “okay”. After uttering those words, the person who is being “forgiven” feels some sort of relief. However, I often find that the issue never really leaves me after that brief phrase.
If you cannot forgive someone, you cannot show true love to them or anyone else. We are called to forgive others just as we have also been forgiven. It is written in the sixth chapter of Matthew verses 14 and 15:
14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others of their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (NIV)
Whether you're a believer or not, if you expect to be shown love and forgiveness, you too should love and forgive.
"Honesty is the best policy," it is a phrase many have heard multiple times since they were a child. It's a motto of sorts to me because I have felt for quite some time now that being truthful keeps me out of trouble (or at least lessens the severity of my punishments). However, I often found myself being almost completely truthful to people but still holding back. I could tell a classmate, "Hey girl, I love that top!", but still be thinking in my head, "I hope it gets ruined because that one time ten years ago you ruined my favorite t-shirt with your markers". I was truthful to the girl, I did love her top. The situation became tense in my mind though. I realized that in order for relationships with others to be completely truthful, you can't hold grudges. You must forgive and truly move on.
Forgiveness, real forgiveness, is powerful. It can mend broken hearts, unite abandoned friendships, and even save lives. It works from deep within, and it's a mighty act to master.
