1. Mini Halloween-Shaped Pretzels

You know the ones I’m talking about... shaped like bats and spider webs. But, usually they are just stale and broken into tiny crumbs. So, you usually throw them away, or trade them with someone who has no taste in candy.

2. Loose Candy Corn

Not only is this really sketchy to just hand out handfuls of loose candy corn to kids, it’s just plain gross. I never have actually met anyone who really does like candy corn... Why do they still make it? Why do they make weird flavors that nobody should have ever thought of?

3. Smarties

if you ever wanted to voluntarily eat chalk that maybe had a slightly fruit flavor, then these are the perfect solution! *blegh*

4. Any Jolly Ranchers Besides Watermelon or Blue Raspberry

You know that the kids before you took all of the good flavors and left you with cherry, grape, and apple. Which honestly, aren’t worth the hype of Jolly Ranchers. Honestly, I’d rather have chocolate than hard candy.

5. Whoppers

No, not the burger...the malt candy balls that taste like melted cardboard with sugar on top. They also smell pretty weird when you eat them, which isn’t a great sign.

6. A Box of Rasins

I don’t know why so many adults think kids like rasins. They try to give them to us at school with lunch, and now they want to ruin our candy filled night with a small cardboard box of sad, wrinkly, drier than the desert grapes? I don’t think so.

7. Taffy

I’m not talking about salt water taffy, because that is a gift from the candy gods, but I’m taking about the random Halloween colored taffy that tastes like nothing but something all at once. This is a last resort.

8. Candy Sticks

Formally known as candy cigarettes, these are up there with smarties, as they taste like a piece of chalk. Thankfully, these also look like chalk and lack any kind of actual flavor!

9. A Toothbrush

Kids don’t want to be reminded to brush their teeth, especially on a night where dental hygiene is not even thought about. Kids want to fill their mouths with sugar and sweets, and they have a night to do it. Why are you going to ruin it with your cute little toothbrush and toothpaste? Let them live!