When Homesickness Finally Kicks In.
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

Okay, I'll Admit It: I'm Finally Homesick

After three-and-a-half months of school and our first official break, the homesickness has finally kicked in.

35
https://pxhere.com/en/photo/7782
Pxhere

August 22nd. When the day finally rolled around, every second I had spent waiting for it through junior and senior year of high school seemed to compact itself into the two-hour drive between New York City and Radnor Township. I was seventeen. Anticipation crawled like ants across my skin as I watched the Freedom Tower grow smaller and smaller in the distance. I was itching to get out, and as we passed the tollbooth into New Jersey, I was halfway there.

I have never been the type to comfort in being in one place for too long. I am victim to wanderlust- one of the most important factors in choosing my top colleges, bolstering Villanova further as my dream school, was distance. I crave new places. I crave change. In my mind, what greater difference was there than that between chaotic urban life in New York City and tranquil Pennsylvanian suburbia? In my heart of hearts, despite living all seventeen years of my life in New York with no prior exposure to living with a moment to spare, I was convinced I was meant to be there. There lived no doubt in my mind that I was ready for the drastic switch; resilience was one of my most powerful traits, and it was sure to thrive in this abrupt situation of change.

The redundancy of day-to-day life irks me to no end, and after a summer of waiting, move-in day electrified me. I remember standing in front of my family's rented red van, hands in my pockets, brown eyes alight with a glow that challenged even the sun on that cloudless summer day, and laughing when my mother asked why I looked like I wasn't going to miss her. Although I deeply care for my family, when I returned alone to my dorm that day, there was not an ounce of my soul that throbbed with missing them. It didn't even occur to me to do so. I was alive with the idea of the new experiences waiting in the mist for me. It'll kick in later, my mother warned me. Yet, as the days went by, the weeks melting into each other beneath loads of schoolwork piling atop my shoulders, I noticed I still wasn't bothered.

Friends around me often spoke of their own homesickness. Some talked to their families every day over the phone or through facetime, but all at least texted. For the first two and a half months of school, my mother and I barely spoke apart from necessary text messages about finances and my dog. When fall break began to approach on October 13th, I almost dreaded it.

Villanova had become more than just my home away from home. It had become my home.

Yet, much to my surprise, fall break was a whirlwind of a fantastic week. From Friday, October 13th, to Sunday, October 21st, I spent every single day out with friends, rampaging across the city and eating as much food as I possibly could no matter how sick it made me feel the next day. I saw my grandmother, my parents, my twin sister and, of course, my dog. I baked. I watched my favorite television shows (The Pioneer Women and, courtesy of this break, American Horror Story Cult on Netflix). When Sunday rolled around, I followed my dad through the pandemonium of Penn Station at 11:00 in the morning and boarded the NJ Transit Train to Trenton. I had two more trains ahead of me to catch, but as I settled into my seat, thinking of all the things I needed to do when I got back to campus, something uninvited settled in me. Something devoid. Something throbbing.

I stepped foot in my dorm at 3:34 p.m. and by 10:00 that night, I had cried five times. I cried myself into a nap. I cried watching YouTube in a failed attempt to distract myself. I cried twice in the shower. I cried on the phone with my best friend, confessing an emptiness inside of me I couldn't understand.

"Why am I feeling this way?" I said between tearful pauses. "I loved it here. What happened over a week?"

"It's okay," she soothed. "You're probably just homesick."

There I was- the too-cool-to-cry college kid who thought she had it all together finally stricken by homesickness just as the epidemic was beginning to pass. I was almost disappointed in myself for letting it get to me. I had avoided it for so long, so it only frustrated me trying to understand why, after all this time; after hearing everyone's stories and still not encountering any understanding of my own; after almost three months of school, I was finallyhomesick. It made no sense to me. I ambled through the rest of that night with a depressive fog shrouding my mind, which would cling to the sides of my skull for the next couple of days. Yet, despite my disheartened state, my resilience managed to power its way through the haze and keep me going nonetheless. Though a struggle, I plundered through my classes, got back to working out on the schedule I had developed in the months leading up to break, and began eating much healthier than whatever I could scavenge on the New York City streets I had left behind.

I can confidently say I am already out of the rut, ready to reembrace the home I had created here before. I have rediscovered just what I love about this campus and why it became my home to me so quickly. What I have learned, however, in the few short days I shared my bed with homesickness, is that no matter how much I love change and the new experiences that call my name elsewhere, I love my family and friends more. No matter where I call my home, my family and friends will always be my true one. Home is where the heart is, after all- yet another thing I learned, in the moment I hung up the phone after talking to my best friend, is that no matter where I go or where I am, they will always be with me.

So, it's time to be resilient. Homesickness, get the hell out of my bed- I need my rest to take on whatever new experiences are waiting for me tomorrow.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

936346
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

113138
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lots of people sat on the cinema wearing 3D glasses
Pinterest

Ever wonder what your friend meant when they started babbling about you taking their stapler? Or how whenever you ask your friend for a favor they respond with "As You Wish?" Are you looking for new and creative ways to insult your friends?

Well, look no further. Here is a list of 70 of the most quotable movies of all time. Here you will find answers to your questions along with a multitude of other things such as; new insults for your friends, interesting characters, fantastic story lines, and of course quotes to log into your mind for future use.

Keep Reading...Show less
New Year Resolutions

It's 2024! You drank champagne, you wore funny glasses, and you watched the ball drop as you sang the night away with your best friends and family. What comes next you may ask? Sadly you will have to return to the real world full of work and school and paying bills. "Ah! But I have my New Year's Resolutions!"- you may say. But most of them are 100% complete cliches that you won't hold on to. Here is a list of those things you hear all around the world.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Ultimate Birthday: Unveiling the Perfect Day to Celebrate!

Let's be real, the day your birthday falls on could really make or break it.

77645
​different color birthday candles on a cake
Blacksburg Children's Museum

You heard it here first: birthdays in college are some of the best days of your four years. For one day annually, you get to forget about your identity as a stressed, broke, and overworked student, and take the time to celebrate. You can throw your responsibilities for a day, use your one skip in that class you hate, receive kind cards and gifts from loved ones and just enjoy yourself.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments