We’ve all been there, complaining to our friends and family, classmates and acquaintances, in person or online. Whether it is about school, work, family members or significant others, you are always finding a reason to complain. Then you start to feel miserable because you get so lost in what you don’t have, that you forget what you do have.

To not get stuck in the endless circle of complaints, there has to be a change. Specifically, a change in your outlook on life. For example, online you always see people posting memes about how “single” they are. It is usually a picture of a text or even Kermit the frog making a joke about being “forever alone.” While these are harmless memes, along with posting relationship quotes (and I’ve been there), you end up looking desperate and sad.

Venting online can be very tempting, and we really have all done it in today’s generation. Some of us have no filters. But the safest way to not look bad is venting literally anywhere BUT online. Then, going back to that “issue” of being “single forever” has to stop. Life isn’t all about having significant others to lean on. Yes, it is nice to have someone, but in your late teens and early twenties, thirties, or maybe even later, you can manage without a relationship.

Now, instead of focusing on the imaginary significant other you don’t have, focus on the people who genuinely care for you and wish the best for you. For example, your parents, your friends, best friends, extended family. Even the people who just simply wish you well and are interested in your social media accounts. No, social media is not the way to count your blessings, but it is always nice to see that people are interested in your life even though you are not a celebrity.

Also, don’t forget about your teachers, professors, and mentors who have helped and are helping you create your future and be more involved in your goals. So right now, you could be sitting and thinking “Oh I have no one” and slip into an unnecessary depression, or you can think “Wow, many people want me to do well and care about my future. I should put more effort into reaching my goals.”

If something is genuinely making you feel unhappy, the suggestion would be to find a way out of it. Maybe it’s a really negative friend, and you can have a discussion with them about how negatively they are rubbing off on you. Now, if they are willing to change their ways, you can continue to have contact with them, and if not, learn to distance yourself from people and situations that do not help you.

Another unideal situation would be if you are low on funds. All of a sudden, you find that you have to cut down on what you spend on besides necessary things. You can’t get your nails or hair done, but you can buy lunch if you have nothing at home. You can easily, in this situation, get down on the fact you don’t have many luxuries anymore, or you can take this time to figure out what is necessary to spend on and what you can do yourself. Sure your nails and hair CAN be professionally done, but YOU can do it yourself. That’ll help you feel more independent as well.

You can take a low-funds situation and make it into learning how to do things yourself besides grooming yourself. You can cook instead of eat out. Find a fun new recipe and get excited! This is good practice for when you eventually move out and live alone. There’s a silver lining to everything.

Lastly, it’s the end of the semester. You’ve got several papers and tests and you are feeling overwhelmed, but GUESS WHAT, you made it through another semester! You did all the work up until now and you WILL finish! Cheer on your friends who are having doubts about finishing the semester. SPREAD POSITIVITY, STOP COMPLAINING, AND BREATHE! Only you are in control of how you respond to a situation!