Bisexual People Dating Someone Of The Opposite Gender Doesn't Mean They Say 'Bye' To Their Bisexuality

Bisexual people seem to be really confusing to the general public. There's the rhetoric of "pick a team, already!" and "I bet you're secretly just gay," which already complicates the way bisexuals are allowed to express themselves. As a bisexual woman, I tend to date mostly men, but that doesn't negate my bisexuality! I still identify as a bisexual woman and I still am attracted to both men and women, regardless of whom I'm dating or talking to.

The perception that bisexuals need to be actively pursuing both genders at all times to maintain their bisexuality is utter bullsh*t. I don't have to 'prove' my bisexuality by dating the perfect balance of men and women and frankly, no one should feel forced to act in a certain way because of their sexual identity. We are all individuals who have different sexual attractions and that is 100% okay.

In the dominant narrative of bisexuality, once you come out of the closet, so-to-speak, you are seen as 'other.' One of the first people I ever came out to immediately started talking about how she would never feel comfortable going down on a girl and she put me in a position of 'Other' immediately. Being bisexual means not fully being a part of the straight community and not fully being accepted by the gay community.

So, if you attend a queer pride rally and you wonder what the 'straight' couple is doing there, think twice. Someone in that relationship more than likely identifies as a part of the queer community, even if they don't look like it. Realistically though, queer people are normal people that you encounter in your daily life without always realizing it. We don't have to look a certain way in order to be queer.