1. "I am Beyonce always."

2. "I'm not superstitious but I am a little stitious."

3. "I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense I had no idea what to do."

4. "I...declare...BANCRUPTCY!"

5. "Oh God, my mind is going a mile an hour."

6. "Make friends first. Make sales second. Make love third. In no particular order."

7. "I don't hate it, I just don't like it at all, and its terrible."

8. ""Well just tell him to call me ASAP as possible."

9. "Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid pf how much they love me."

10. "The only time I set the bar low is for limbo."

11. "Thats what she said."

12. "Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going."

13. "I tried to talk to Toby and be his friend, but that is like trying to be friends with an evil snail."

14. "Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what."

15. "NO, GOD! PLEASE NO! NO! NO! NOOOO!"

16. "Why are you the way that you are?"

17. "The worst thing about prison was the dementors!"

18. "When the son of the deposed king of Nigeria emails you directly asking for help, you help! HIs father ran the freaking country! Okay?"

19. "And you know whats gonna be on your tombstone? 'Loser'."

20. "Websters dictionary defines wedding as 'The fusing of two metals with a hot torch'."

21. "St. Patricks Day is the closest thing the Irish have to Christmas."