We've all been there: your best friend gets in a relationship and you go from seeing them about every ounce of free time you have to seeing them once in a blue moon. Or you've been in the situation where you find yourself wondering where the heck your best friend went, because the person you've been hanging out with lately has gone through a major personality change, thanks again to the new third party. Or, you could be in the position I was in the majority of the year, the 5th wheel, the odd friend out in our group of three that didn't have a boyfriend.
I've seen the good, when my best friends are head over heels happy and in love. I've seen the bad, when they would come into my room crying after a phone call with their significant other that went less than perfect. And man, have I seen the ugly, the World War III that erupted over a boy.
That's not to say I'm completely innocent, either. I, too, recently got into a relationship, making all three of us off the market. It's nearly impossible to fight the urges of the "honeymoon phase." You want to hang out with your new boyfriend or girlfriend every waking minute of the day, because you're likely not happier than usual. I know I'm definitely guilty of blowing off plans or choosing to hang out with my boyfriend over my friends. It's so hard to balance, especially if your boyfriend and your friends don't necessarily get along. But, dare I say, it is possible to do.
It's important to not let either your significant other or your best friends cloud your judgement. A lot of times, arguments arise when we let either party brainwash us into thinking a certain way. We are 19 years old; we are more than capable of making decisions for ourselves, decisions that both our best friends and our boyfriend should respect. It's also important to not forget about one or the other. Both of them should get that you want to spread the love as much as possible, so they should understand when they can't have you every night.
Boyfriends: respect girls night, dancing around dorm rooms, eating pizza, and watching sad movies. Yes, we check out guys from time to time, but can you really blame us for having crushes on Zac Efron and Ryan Gosling?! Best friends: respect date night. Believe it or not, we sometimes like to dress up on a Friday night and go to a nice restaurant and the whole sha-bang.
The human race has this nearly insatiable need to love and to be loved. Sometimes, it feels like when one of the people you love most -- your best friend -- finds someone who loves them, that the new person won't love them as much as you do. It's this odd form of jealousy. It's hard to see your best friend go to someone who isn't you when they're sad or they need help, or if they just want someone to hang out with.
But, I think what we all need to remember in these circumstances is that you're not being replaced, your best friend is just getting all the love he or she deserves in this crazy love-hungry world.
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