I am a student.
I am a growing mind constantly learning, with an urge to grow and an urge to learn.
I am a working member of society. Though I shouldn't have had to, I have earned a say in what I experience in my every day life.
I vow to never have my voice as a student and as a member of this society stifled by the contempt of a man who labels me as "angry".
I should be angry. But I am not angry at all.
I am passionate. I have found a love for things and people that makes me want to yell at the top of my lungs but still I confine myself to a keyboard and a blank screen. I feel and I feel with every nerve, every fiber of my being and if my feelings stay shut up they become ineffective. They remain unreal. It escapes me why anyone would think one should feel and cradle their feelings in their soul rather than let them be shared with the very people I love.
I am nurturing. I want the best for all I know. I want all to see me and know there is a safety in my voice and in my heart. I want to protect and I want to secure everyone from the hatred that seeps into their souls in the quiet of the night or encloses itself in the fear that strangles people when they are told they must hate to survive.
I am sad. I am sad when hatred wins. I am sad that people feel they must take the reign of the all and powerful, that they must hold the responsibility to control the "other". That people don't feel that they can coexist because they are afraid it will lessen their existence on a planet that, in simplest terms, insists they do exist. That people think color of skin, social status, etc. will make them a better human.
I am determined. Determined to never let an argument go untouched without my passion. Without my nurturing. Without my hope that people will be able to understand that they are safe in a world where people are not all the same.
I am not angry. You will not decide that my voice is one of anger. You do not tell me that when I think, feel, and act that it is from nothing more than an angry woman. As long as you may speak your part, I may speak mine. And I may raise my voice and disagree, but what makes your speech one of bravery and mine of contempt? When I see you cheering for men who speak the same words I do, but you tell me to pipe down? Should I quiet myself as the men are speaking? You are wrong. Too long have we been shut out when we have long known our contributions could shake the Earth. Too long have we conspired in hidden groups hoping one day we can be seen. Too long have we been told that we cannot think rationally because we cannot rationalize as "hormonal", "irate", "hysteric" women. And you can challenge this and say that it is not what you meant, but until your double standards do not stain every media I see and every hall I walk I refuse to believe you.
I refuse to let you control my body, my mind, or my heart. You will not get to decide how I feel.
And if one day I become angry, you will know.