If I had to use one word to describe myself, the first word that comes to mind is kind. My whole life, I have always been as kind as I can to people. I don't like to tell people no when they ask me for things, I always try my hardest to be kind to everyone (no matter how mad they have made me), and I've always forgiven or given someone the benefit of the doubt when they didn't deserve it. I don't like to hurt other people's feelings, even if they've done me wrong.
I've always had a big heart and I've always wanted to believe the best in people.
I just want to believe that everyone can change. I want to believe that everyone is honest. I always try to find the best in people, but the truth is not everyone has the same heart that I have. And I've finally realized that I can't be kind and forgiving to everyone that I come across. Not everyone deserves my kindness.
But once you're too forgiving to someone for too long, you realize just how problematic it can be. After years of being like this, it's beginning to feel like some people just take advantage of that kindness. It's like they know that I have a big heart and that I'll forgive everything. So they continue to do wrong because they know they'll be forgiven.
But things are about to change.
I'm not about to turn in Cruella de Vil or anything, but not everyone deserves the kindness that I have. Not everyone deserves to be forgiven for their actions, and they especially don't deserve to be forgiven for the same behavior over and over because they obviously haven't learned their lesson.
So, I made the decision to cut some people off. My kindness is reserved for those who actually deserve it. From now on, I won't be the person who just forgives and forgets everything.
